Looking Back and Moving Forward
I can't believe that it will be Christmas in just two days. People always say that time flies, but it really has this year!
2006 has been pretty eventful and in a way, I'm relieved that it is almost time for a fresh start. However, though there have been difficult experiences over the months, I've also had some of the most amazing times of my life.
On the down side, I lost my good friend Lane in April and my aunt in May to cancer. I still think about them everyday and I don't think that will ever change. But it's because of what happened to them that I realize life IS short and try to appreciate more of the good things that I DO have.
Around the same time, I left a job that I loved at a non-profit organization to join an investment bank. This was so that I could earn more money to finance the gorgeous apartment I bought last year. The stress I've had to go through hasn't always been easy, but I knew it was the trade off I had to make.
I miss my old boss a lot and she will always have my utmost respect, but I've also learnt so much on the new job. I entered an industry in which I had basically no knowledge. In just eight months, I've found out much more about the stock market and also started an investment fund for my retirement. I have met some great people here and it's always a bonus when you like colleagues enough to make them your friends. I think this job will challenge me for a while to come and that is a good thing as I never want to stop learning.
On a positive note, my relationships with my dad and his girlfriend (whom I jokingly refer to as 'my stepmum') have improved tremendously. It is an ongoing process of getting to know each other. My dad has mellowed over the years and does his best. But sometimes, he still rubs me up the wrong way! People say it's because we are so similar and I guess they are right. We are both stubborn, outspoken and on occasion, grumpy b*ggers! But, I love him anyway and he's always good for a laugh. How many people can boast about hanging out with their dad at a biker bar?! Not that many I would imagine!
I also spent most of 2006 without a 'significant other' and I can say with all honesty that I really enjoyed being single. But don't misunderstand me. P is the mirror of who I am and I wouldn't trade him for anyone else. However, getting comfortable with myself was one of the greatest things I did for me this year. I know that P respects me more because I can take care of myself and am with him not out of need, but out of love.
It has not been all roses for us though. Aside from the uncertainty and stress stemming from his job search, we are both fiercely independent people who had pretty much accepted that we would be single for the rest of our lives. It is taking us time to get used to the 'change of status' and all the issues that being in a relationship brings. We didn't date like most other couples and within a 24-hour period, went from 'single and carefree' to 'living together'. Not the most ideal situation, but that is just the way it happened.
For all of you who are still looking for someone not just to love, but to really be IN love with, I believe that the key is to be happy with yourself first. It has taken me almost 37 years to find P, and it came at a juncture in my life where I was finally comfortable with being on my own. At my dad's birthday dinner earlier this week, he told P and me, "When you are in a relationship with the wrong person, it diminishes who you are. But when you are with the right person, it makes you the best person that you can be." This is the relationship that I've always wanted but never had. P is my "Best Friend Plus" and I am thankful for all the wonderful things that he has brought into my life.
Like my respected friend Gim (Gorgeous Italian Man) once told me, life is made up of positive and negative experiences and you don't have one without the other. I am lucky to have a very tight circle of friends, both on our small island and overseas. But I've also had to cut two women out of my life this year. It wasn't decisions that I took lightly as I did care for them a lot. But I know that it was the right thing to do as they were just sucking my energy dry. I've come to the conclusion that it is very difficult to be friends with insecure women, as they are constantly needing reassurance that they are not fat, old, ugly (fill in the blank), etc. BORING! Because they are so unsure of themselves, they also then do things that are detrimental to the friendship. That is just not something I am interested in being around. My time is precious and I don't want to waste it hanging out with people that I cannot learn from.
As 2007 approaches, I want to take stock of all the things that I am thankful for and to focus on what I would like to achieve next year. For the former, it is pretty easy i.e. my family, friends, good health, a wonderful man who loves and accepts me as I am and the opportunity to develop my skills at work.
In terms of the latter, I want to continue to evolve as a person and to always remain centered, regardless of what is going on around me. To do this, I need to meditate more and to party less (so much easier said than done!). I want to continue to show my loved ones how much I appreciate them and on a larger scale, give as much as I can afford to charity.
I have quite a few parties over the Christmas and New Year period and I look forward to spending time with those that I love. I also want to thank all of you who have supported me through the tough times this year, especially my dad and 'stepmum', my flatmate Rachel and my friends living in Bali, Copenhagen, London, Memphis, Nottingham and Zurich.
Let the good times roll!
2006 has been pretty eventful and in a way, I'm relieved that it is almost time for a fresh start. However, though there have been difficult experiences over the months, I've also had some of the most amazing times of my life.
On the down side, I lost my good friend Lane in April and my aunt in May to cancer. I still think about them everyday and I don't think that will ever change. But it's because of what happened to them that I realize life IS short and try to appreciate more of the good things that I DO have.
Around the same time, I left a job that I loved at a non-profit organization to join an investment bank. This was so that I could earn more money to finance the gorgeous apartment I bought last year. The stress I've had to go through hasn't always been easy, but I knew it was the trade off I had to make.
I miss my old boss a lot and she will always have my utmost respect, but I've also learnt so much on the new job. I entered an industry in which I had basically no knowledge. In just eight months, I've found out much more about the stock market and also started an investment fund for my retirement. I have met some great people here and it's always a bonus when you like colleagues enough to make them your friends. I think this job will challenge me for a while to come and that is a good thing as I never want to stop learning.
On a positive note, my relationships with my dad and his girlfriend (whom I jokingly refer to as 'my stepmum') have improved tremendously. It is an ongoing process of getting to know each other. My dad has mellowed over the years and does his best. But sometimes, he still rubs me up the wrong way! People say it's because we are so similar and I guess they are right. We are both stubborn, outspoken and on occasion, grumpy b*ggers! But, I love him anyway and he's always good for a laugh. How many people can boast about hanging out with their dad at a biker bar?! Not that many I would imagine!
I also spent most of 2006 without a 'significant other' and I can say with all honesty that I really enjoyed being single. But don't misunderstand me. P is the mirror of who I am and I wouldn't trade him for anyone else. However, getting comfortable with myself was one of the greatest things I did for me this year. I know that P respects me more because I can take care of myself and am with him not out of need, but out of love.
It has not been all roses for us though. Aside from the uncertainty and stress stemming from his job search, we are both fiercely independent people who had pretty much accepted that we would be single for the rest of our lives. It is taking us time to get used to the 'change of status' and all the issues that being in a relationship brings. We didn't date like most other couples and within a 24-hour period, went from 'single and carefree' to 'living together'. Not the most ideal situation, but that is just the way it happened.
For all of you who are still looking for someone not just to love, but to really be IN love with, I believe that the key is to be happy with yourself first. It has taken me almost 37 years to find P, and it came at a juncture in my life where I was finally comfortable with being on my own. At my dad's birthday dinner earlier this week, he told P and me, "When you are in a relationship with the wrong person, it diminishes who you are. But when you are with the right person, it makes you the best person that you can be." This is the relationship that I've always wanted but never had. P is my "Best Friend Plus" and I am thankful for all the wonderful things that he has brought into my life.
Like my respected friend Gim (Gorgeous Italian Man) once told me, life is made up of positive and negative experiences and you don't have one without the other. I am lucky to have a very tight circle of friends, both on our small island and overseas. But I've also had to cut two women out of my life this year. It wasn't decisions that I took lightly as I did care for them a lot. But I know that it was the right thing to do as they were just sucking my energy dry. I've come to the conclusion that it is very difficult to be friends with insecure women, as they are constantly needing reassurance that they are not fat, old, ugly (fill in the blank), etc. BORING! Because they are so unsure of themselves, they also then do things that are detrimental to the friendship. That is just not something I am interested in being around. My time is precious and I don't want to waste it hanging out with people that I cannot learn from.
As 2007 approaches, I want to take stock of all the things that I am thankful for and to focus on what I would like to achieve next year. For the former, it is pretty easy i.e. my family, friends, good health, a wonderful man who loves and accepts me as I am and the opportunity to develop my skills at work.
In terms of the latter, I want to continue to evolve as a person and to always remain centered, regardless of what is going on around me. To do this, I need to meditate more and to party less (so much easier said than done!). I want to continue to show my loved ones how much I appreciate them and on a larger scale, give as much as I can afford to charity.
I have quite a few parties over the Christmas and New Year period and I look forward to spending time with those that I love. I also want to thank all of you who have supported me through the tough times this year, especially my dad and 'stepmum', my flatmate Rachel and my friends living in Bali, Copenhagen, London, Memphis, Nottingham and Zurich.
Let the good times roll!
posted by SG Babe | 4:18 PM
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