A Woman's Notes from a Very Small Island

I'm in Brrringland!

2008-03-18T00:54:00.000+08:00

I arrived safely in London after a five-hour delay on Oz Airways as there was a mechanical problem on the original plane and they had to find a replacement. I am jetlagged but at the same time, excited and happy to be here. P and I have had a long distance relationship for a year and thankfully, our time to be together has come.

The house that P found us is just perfect and I love it! We took a short walk along the river yesterday, which is literally just around the corner. Even with the gloomy skies and slight drizzle, the scenery was still stunning. I can only imagine how beautiful it will look in the summer when the trees are in full bloom. But don't take my word for it. See for yourself and drool!

The last couple of weeks on the Small Island were bittersweet. It was hard saying good bye to all my good friends. But I know that I'm lucky that I have so many great people in my life! I will miss you all a lot.

However, I also can't wait to start my new life here! I already have a lunch appointment this week and will meet more friends coming into town next week.

Anyway, my stuff should arrive next month so once the house is fully decorated, I will post photos. You can be sure that it will all look amazing! P really outdid himself with finding us this place. I am writing this in the living room right now, which has a lovely period detail like the carved ceiling light. This house was built in the 1883 and is much bigger than my apartment on our Small Island (though that really wouldn't be difficult). I would estimate it at at least 1,400 square feet excluding the garden courtyard.

As it's St Patrick's Day, P and I are going to our local pub for a nice drink. Be seeing you!

There is a Season for All Things

2008-03-03T09:42:00.002+08:00

And thank goodness winter is just about over!

I resigned from my job last week (yahooooooooooooo!) and will shortly be off to sunnier (figuratively, not literally) shores. Most of you know that I’ve been extremely unhappy with my work situation for the past year. But I stayed on because of my new apartment and the wedding. I was also waiting for the bonus, which is enough to pay for my move plus also furnish our new house in London!

Going to work everyday was really a drag, but now I just want to focus on the positive things that are coming up.

I will definitely miss our small island, but I am also very excited about my new life with P. He has found us a fabulous three-bedroom detached house in a suburb only 30 minutes by train to the city centre. It even has a little courtyard garden at the back and I’m already planning to have bbq parties this summer! We are turning the third and smallest bedroom into a walk-in closet, so will have good-sized master and guest bedrooms. There is plenty of space for any of you who want to come and stay, but make sure you bring me lost of food supplies from our small island!

The icing on the cake is that the house is only a five-minute walk to the picturesque river. The path along the water is dotted with cosy pubs, five-star restaurants and coffee shops serving delicious cakes. And I for one can’t wait to enjoy them with my fantastic husband!

I will spend the upcoming days running around to the banks and so on doing what I need to do. Most of my lunch and dinner dates are already filled, but I am sure I can squeeze you in if you want to bid me farewell with a glass of champagne or two. ;-)

I have also decided that to retire this blog. It was fun while it lasted, but I am starting a new chapter in my life now and will no longer be on this small island. So much has changed since my first entry about keys on d*cks in August 2006. In the year and a half since, I moved into my own home, got married (who would’ve thought?!!) and now, am going to live in another country. Exciting times indeed!

For all your support and friendship, thank you guys so much. I will definitely be in touch again soon!

Our Bedroom Piece

2008-01-23T09:20:00.000+08:00

I have been hunting high and low for a suitable artwork to hang in our bedroom and I finally found it this weekend.

In Brrringland, P and I had looked at several galleries and I did see a subtle watercolour-on-paper nude that I liked. However, at over GPB500, we decided to give it a miss because it wasn't anything special. It shows the back view of a woman laying on her side and P said that we could find that sort of art in most galleries in the western world.

After enjoying my other three new pieces for a few days, I decided to head down to the gallery again to see if I could find anything else to collect. He had some charcoal-coloured nudes but they were very 'in your face'. I'm all for p*rn but I sure as heck ain't gonna' pay $1,500 for it!

Suddenly, the gallery owner pulled out this piece from his hidden stash at the back of the shop and I gasped with pleasure. I love that although it is a nude, it is also tribal and manages to combine humour in it. This was hung up in the artist's own home (the same guy who did "Ooh...I like my place!") and depicts himself and his wife. Although her chest is a restricted zone as symbolized by the red box, he stretches out his hand as far as he can and just keeps on trying to grab her b**bs! The painting is aptly titled "Kiss My...!"

It made me laugh because P is soooo like that as well. He can never keep his hands off me and I'm often batting them away. This clever piece of work will definitely have pride of place in our bedroom.

I've taken photos of it both in day light and at night with soft yellow lighting. Either way you look at it, it's gorgeous and perfect for us!

Ooh...I Like My Art!

2008-01-18T09:09:00.000+08:00

I finally got my other three new pieces of art home last night and I just had to share.

The two semi-abstract landscapes are from one artist and the red abstract is from another.

Title: "Resort City II"

Title: "Sunset City"

Title: "Ooh...I like my place!"

The gallery owner actually recommended that I buy the abstract to round off my collection. When I first saw it, I wasn't that keen. However, I decided to trust his advice and I'm so glad that I did. The more I look at it, the more I love it! In person, the colours are so rich and the texture of the painting is simply beautiful.

The artist has become hugely collectable in the last few years and this piece depicts how his house that has grown along with his success.

I can relate to it because only a couple of years ago, I finally had enough for the deposit to pay for my own apartment after working for over 10 years. It is a very satifying feeling.

The problem with collecting art is that there is just so much beautiful work out there. Now I'm thinking of getting a couple of smaller pieces as well. Ooh...no!

Small Island Girl

2008-01-14T11:01:00.000+08:00

Recently, I cut my hair into a bob: parted in the middle, shorter at the back and tapering to a longer length at the front. My hair falls perfectly straight even without blow drying.

In the last two weeks, two people that have asked me straight after I've been introduced to them if I'm a flight stewardess!

My first reaction was to feel insulted. Although I think it's a great lifestyle and a fantastic job option for a young woman just having left school, there are just so many negative connotations with regards to trolly dollies. However, after talking to P, I've had a change of heart.

He says that I should be flattered that at almost 38, I'm still mistaken for someone in her 20s. He also thinks that I look like the Small Island Girls in the advertising campaign as I am tall, slim and beautiful.

Is it any wonder that a) I have such a huge ego and b) I love this man to bits?!!

Brrrrrighton, Here We Come!

2008-01-05T00:06:00.000+08:00

We took a day trip down to Brighton, the place where P grew up. The fast train is less than an hour from central London.

Walking alone the little lanes in the town centre was fascinating as there are a lot of boutique shops selling unique handicrafts and expensive clothes and jewellery. My favourite part was the Pier, where P and I relived our youth and wasted money on video games and junk food!

I'll let the photos speak for Brighton's very appealing charms:

Even with the wintry weather, it's a gorgeous beachside town. Will definitely be visiting again once it warms up in the next few months!

The Best and the Worst

2008-01-03T22:53:00.000+08:00

After being here for a couple of weeks, I've come up with my own list of the best and worst that Brringland has to offer the intrepid SG Babe. As I'm an eternal optimist, I'll start of on a positive note.

Best of Brit, the:

Post-Christmas sales and a lovely new hubby who will buy you whatever you want ;-)
Weather, which is suitable for wearing knee-high leather boots (I have two pairs)
Chance to expand my wardrobe ha ha
SG/MY monthly dim sum meet up group of very nice people
Jewellery Channel
Opportunities to try new things

And last but certainly not least, drinking mulled wine/Pimms with ginger ale in a cosy pub with a roaring fire down by the Thames River. Pure bliss!

Worst of Brit, the:

Wind when it's bitterly cold
Expensive food that doesn't taste all that great
High cost of sub-standard housing

Oh MAH-velous, just MAH-velous!

2008-01-02T00:32:00.000+08:00

My first post of the year is about my latest passion: art. In my quest for self-improvement and education, I convinced P to take me to the Tate Modern today.

Walking over the Millenium Bridge, you can see that the Tate is a huge and impressive museum housing seven floors of different types of modern art. The first thing we did was head to the cafe for a latte and a croissant as we wanted to be properly fortified to walk round the cavernous building.

In the basement was this installation called "The Crack". No, it wasn't an ode to young women the world over in hipster jeans or construction workers bending over drills. Instead a gigantic split like an earthquake fault ran along the entire length of the concrete basement floor of the museum.

After staring at it for a few seconds with a puzzled look on his face, P said, "It's all very nice, but I can hardly have this in my living room can I?"

I told him, "Yes you could, and all you would need is a sledge hammer and a chisel. Though your downstairs neighbour might be a bit cheesed off!"

Believe it or not, people actually seemed to be meditating into the crack of the floor and taking it all very seriously. I had a quick peek too, and all I saw in there was dirt and some sweet wrappers thrown in by other visitors before me. Yawn.

Things improved a few floors up, and we saw two pieces that we loved. One was a very large Monet, a pond scene in his usual soft tones and lovely hues. The other piece just blew my mind: an abstract by the American artist Joan Mitchell. At first, I thought it was by the singer Joni Mitchell until P corrected me. See why I need educating in the art world?

I can't remember the title of it, but it was captivating and something you could look at for ages. I could so have that in my home! But as her art works sell for millions, yes millions of dollars, maybe in my next life time. Even her signed lithographs are over $2,000 each.

I guess we all have different ways of enjoying art. I don't know about you guys, but when there is a piece that captures my imagination, I can stare at the details for hours, like 'Alone' in my living room. I have since bought three more pieces of art by different Indonesian artists (two landscapes and an abstract), which I will put on the blog once I get them home.

There was also an intelligent and witty exhibition by African artists in bright colours, depicting aspects of war and life in that turbulent continent to great success. P and I truly admired their talent. Not only was it clever, but the paintings themselves were beautifully done.

On the flip side, some of what was on display also made us laugh. One was a slab of wood painted brown (yes, brown wood, how original) hung on the wall and another was a framed piece of fabric with a slash through it. Huh? We could hear some people being completely pretentious and acting as if they knew what all the weird sculptures meant. Some of the descriptions of the art work had me rolling my eyes as well. I know art is all about interpretation, but some of it was really rubbish. I lost interest somewhere between the bidet (I kid you not) and three basketballs in a fish tank. Some people call that art. I call it taking the p*ss.

Happy New Year everyone!

That's Us: Cleverly Disguised!

2007-12-29T04:12:00.000+08:00

Christmas in London - Part 2

2007-12-25T21:54:00.000+08:00

It's not even 2pm on Christmas Day and P and I are stuffed! We started cooking at 10am and just had our lunch. This is the 'before' photo of the food:

And the after:

Of course the portion on the left is mine and the one on the right is P's ha ha. It was pretty good for our first ever meal cooked together (ah married life, it's bliss!) and we hoovered it all up in less than 10 minutes ha ha. Yeller Fever and the Gorgeous M: You guys will get to taste this on 25 December 2008!

The great thing is that we have enough leftover to fry up some bubble and squeak tomorrow woo hoo! I have also had four glasses of Mimosas...burp. ;-p

The weather has become a milder with a touch of rain. P is trying to convince me to go out for a walk but it's so nice and warm in the flat and I really can't be bothered! Top of the Pops in on the telly, a real British classic.

We spoke to Yeller Fever and the Canadian Family this morning. He is over at their place stuffing his face with turkey and all the trimmings. The mum is a fantastic cook (I know as I've had her leftover turkey dinner, yum!) and I'm sure made 20 portions for only six of them!

We hit the sales tomorrow and I just cannot wait! Yahooooooooooo!

Christmas in London - Part 1

2007-12-24T16:19:00.000+08:00

I'm sitting here in fleece booties, jogging bottoms, long-sleeved top and a throw around my shoulders listening to Josh Groban singing Christmas carols. P has gone to the office to earn a living to keep me in the lifestyle to which I've become accustomed and I am chilling out at home. :-)

The last few days have been amazing. I have tried every mulled wine stand in the vicinity and stuffed my gob full of mince pies. Yes it is cold outside, but with the heating on, the flat is lovely and cosy, so much so that my roses and lilies have really bloomed:

We have also hit the pre-Christmas sales and picked up tons of clothes. So far besides the knee-high boots, P has bought me four V-necked jumpers, a grey cableknit turtleneck and lots of lovely moisturizers and stuff. I love Christmas!

We have opted to make our own festive lunch tomorrow. That should be interesting, considering I've never made a roast beef with all the trimmings before! We will have brussel sprouts, parnips, carrots, cabbage, peas and yorkshire pudding with gravy. Yum. If nothing else, this will be good practice for Christmas next year as we've invited Yeller Fever and my American Friend the Gorgeous M to stay with us over the festive season.

Hopefully, the weather will be clear in the afternoon and we can take a walk by the Thames. I think we will both need it after our huge lunch! Anyway, I need to pop out to get another lot of mince pies as I ate the last one this morning ha ha.

Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr it is!

2007-12-21T16:00:00.000+08:00

Well I've landed on Brrringland's surprisingly sunny shores and it is absolutely freezing. However, the air is beautifully crisp and as the sun hits the streets, the sillouette of the bare trees against the clear blue sky is simply stunning. A perfect place to spend the festive season. The shops are all brimming with Christmas goodies and everywhere you look, decorations abound.

My 13-hour flight landed at some ungodly hour, but P was there to meet me at the airport. He surprised me with a beautiful hand bouquet made up of cream roses and lilies, which I thought was very sweet. Am I the luckiest woman in the world or what?!

After a nice Thai lunch (you can take the girl out of Asia but you can't take the Asia out of the girl), I hit the shops near P's office and bought myself a gorgeous pair of black leather knee-high boots for only £45 on sale! They will go perfectly with a tweed skirt suit P got me.

After work today, P and I will head down to the Winter Wonderland in Hyde Park. There is ice skating, a fairground and a German Christmas market. It will be cold of course, but this is how I deal with the weather. I wear long cotton leggings under my jeans and a thermal shirt beneath my cashmere turtleneck. I top it all off with Timberland boots and a ski bunny white down jacket, cashmere hat and gloves.

If it's extra cold, I will have a hot toddy to help me along the way hee hee. I have a feeling that I'll need to drink a few glasses of mulled wine this evening to help keep me warm! Here's to your good health!

Life as an M R S

2007-12-10T09:05:00.000+08:00

I’ve been married for over three weeks now and I love, love, LOVE my new husband. I never thought I would say this, but married life (even if it’s the second time round) is GREAT! Bet most of you thought you’d never hear those words pass my lips, huh. Don’t worry, you’re not the only ones. Even I never thought I would hear those words pass my lips!

It’s been crazy running around seeing friends and getting organized for Brrringland over the Christmas holidays. I’m also putting my wedding scrapbook album together and that has been really wonderful. I can relive the evening over and over without the nervousness and without being pulled in a hundred different directions at the same time. Not that I’m complaining, I loved our wedding day and cannot begin to tell everyone who was there how much it meant to me.

I also want to thank all of you who took photos during the wedding and sent them on afterwards. P and I have laughed our heads off at those taken during the drinks party. I took the CD round to the Canadian Family’s one evening and banished the kids to another room while we howled over the photos.

There is a great one of P on the dance floor sans shirt, another of my good friend’s boyfriend dry h*mping my new husband and some of Yeller Fever (or should I call you White Fever now?!) dancing with this girl, then that girl, then yet another girl, etc. You get the picture.

There is even one of us (bride and groom, our parents aged 60, 62 and 70, various friends, etc) doing a group hug thingy on the dance floor and jumping up and down to the band’s version of our first dance song, “Chasing Cars”! I don’t think anyone else in the crowded club understood why we did that, but it was just brilliant. It still makes me smile whenever I think of it!

P and I often talk about what a top night it was and how we wish we could relive the entire week again, starting from our combi hen/stag night where we went to the Four Floors in the back of the lorry! How drunk were we? OMG.

My ex-husband Mark also flew in for the wedding, which both P and I really appreciated. The evening before the big night, a bunch of us were out drinking (surprise surprise). Mark and I had a very good talk about his mum (whom I adored) and my friend Lane, who both succumbed to cancer a few years ago. It was a bittersweet moment, remembering lost loved ones on what was one of the happiest weeks of my life to date.

But it made me realize something: That not only do I have the best husband in the whole entire universe, but I am also truly blessed that my ex-husband is one of my most treasured and trusted friends. I really am very lucky.

I didn’t realize that I hadn’t written in on the blog for quite a while until the mother in the Canadian Family mentioned it last night when they came round for dinner. I’ve just been so busy working and running errands that one day just rolls on relentlessly into the next and before I’ve realized, it’s a week short of a month since we got married.

Last night while we were waiting for Yeller/White Fever to show up before we started eating, the Young JC from upstairs texted and asked if he could borrow my iron. A few minutes later, the doorbell rang and I saw my frazzled neighbour wearing jeans and an unbuttoned, wrinkled shirt. He came in, said hi to the Canadian Family and told us that all the power sockets in his unit were on the blink. That is not unusal as this is a brand new building and there are still kinks to work out.

I plugged in the iron and set up the board in the hallway, but for some reason, that particular socket didn’t work either. The one in the living room did, so the Young JC had to sort his shirt out where we were all sitting ha ha. If you can imagine, the poor guy had to make conversation with us and pretend that it was a normal occurrence for him to iron without his shirt on in front of people he hardly knows. The Canadians’ 11-year-old daughter’s face was a picture!

I couldn’t help laughing and told him that it was going on the blog. I guess I should thank him for keeping us all entertained.

Anyway, it’s late Sunday evening and I’m enjoying my new Christmas-scented candle (present from the Canadian Family). I’ll end here for now because I want to lie down and read a book. If you don’t hear from me for a few weeks, don’t fret. It’s because I’ll be frolicking in Winter Wonderland with P!

Have a very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Ain’t She Gorgeous!

2007-11-26T08:48:00.000+08:00

I’ve brought my new baby home: the piece to start my art collection. It was painted by an Indonesian artist and is titled ‘Alone’.

The day that I walked by the gallery, I just felt completely compelled to go in. I had no intention of buying anything as P’s and my bank balanced were maxed out with wedding expenses. However, when I saw her, I got the same feeling I did when I saw the showflat for my condo: It was love at first sight and I had to have her.

The photo really does not do the piece any justice. In person, you can see the textures of the paint and it's truly stunning.

If you guys want to know the name of the artist or the gallery where I bought it, email me and maybe I'll tell you. A woman has to have some secrets! ;-)

My Wedding Bling!

2007-11-20T11:01:00.000+08:00

Not to be a show off or anything, but I know that some of you guys overseas are curious to see my wedding and engagement rings. I chose a simple half-eternity band with seven diamonds totally 0.76 carats.

P has already promised to make it into a full eternity ring for our first year anniversary! Roll on November 2008 I say!

We Tied the Knot!

2007-11-19T10:47:00.000+08:00

P and I had a wonderful wedding on Saturday evening and I am now a wife! I can still hardly believe it. But the 4.3 carats of diamonds on my left hand (P has a simple but classic platinum band) and the marriage certificate in my desk drawer proves that it’s true!

I don’t have all the photos yet and these are just a sneak peek. I will post more up on later in the week once everyone has sent me their pics.

We are both still quite tired from all the activities leading up to the event as we spent every evening last week with the wedding party and our friends and family who had flown in from all over the world. But it was soooooo worth it and I am extremely grateful that they made such a huge effort for us. Thank you everyone.

Well, what can I say about the venue? My dad’s partner and her family decorated it beautifully with cream roses and other complementary flowers. Every single chair was tied with hand-arranged sprays and all the table tops had so many floral vases and bowls on them! P made a joke when he saw the venue and asked if there were any other flowers left on our small island! They had also made four huge arrangements that they put on high tables and it looked very Greek and stunning. I even got to walk through an arch made entirely of cream flowers. How extravagent is that?!

The vanilla cake they also organized was really delicious! I love my bridal bouquet and refused to throw it ha ha, and am enjoying the gorgeous blooms at home for a few more days.

Our wedding favors were two types of silver Christmas ornaments, which everyone loved.

The evening itself was everything we had hoped for and more. Everything went off without a glitch and we managed to spend some time with every single person who had come. I didn't have time to eat but thankfully, a couple of flutes of Laurent Perrier managed to make it down my throat!

Our solemniser was so nice and she looked lovely in her cheongsam. We kept the ceremony short and sweet so that our guests could get the party started!

P’s witness and best man was Yeller Fever while the mum from the Canadian Family was my witness. The dad from the Canadian Family had a part to play too! He sang our first dance song ‘Chasing Cars’ by Snow Patrol acoustic and it was amazing. I believe a few tears were shed due to the beautiful lyrics. It was simply perfect.

The speeches by Yeller Fever and P were also very good: heartfelt, humourous and to the point. They both made ‘jokes’ about me writing the speeches for them. Funny, guys, very funny! Hmmm…..

My dad seemed to have a lot of fun and got along very well with P’s mum, dad, uncle and aunt. After dinner, we went by coach to the dance club and my dad was the centre of attention! At some points, he had so many people surrounding him that it seemed more like his wedding!! As I was in charge of the cash and drinks, I had to stay relatively sober.

My dad and P made up for it though, and the latter was stripped down to just his trousers on the dance floor at one point! One of my male colleagues also tried to take P’s pants down, so you can just imagine what kind of night it was!

There was a hen party dancing next to our group and they attempted to steal P’s shirt. However, he wasn’t having any of it and held on tight, shouting, “Give me my shirt back, it’s Paul Smith!”

We finally rolled back to the hotel at 2.30am and as we were extremely hungry, had something to eat before we crashed out.

We woke up the next morning and looked at each other, happy and still incredulous that we were now Mr and Mrs. At about 7.30am, both our phones beeped. It was an sms from Yeller Fever, saying that he was just on his way home!

Truly, it was a WONDERFUL night and by the looks of it, not just for us!! Thank you to all our friends and family, you made the wedding simply unforgettable!

A Pre-Nuptial Update

2007-11-15T14:30:00.000+08:00

I’m sure all of you are sending us good thoughts this week! Things are going very well and a lot of our friends and family (yes, including my future MIL!) have already arrived on our small island with more to come today and tomorrow.

We have been spending every evening with them, bringing them to the best places to eat and going to every happy hour venue in town. Although we are very busy, it has all been great and I’m enjoying every moment of it. I am so glad that we have these amazing friends who have flown half-way across the world to be with us on our special day. I must be doing something right!

There will be more drinking (groan) over the next few nights. Can my liver take it?! Well, I’ll just put on a stiff upper lip and get on with it. Cheers!

Four Floors - Revisited

2007-11-13T15:30:00.000+08:00

P and I had our combi hen and stag night this past weekend with four close friends. As we have the Four Floors to thank for our serendipitous meeting just over a year ago, we decided to go back there to “recreate the night”!

We started out at my apartment with three bottles of champagne kindly donated by my dad. Yeller Fever took a break from his many Chinese women to make us his famous chicken curry. That is really saying something and I am very honoured! Thank you YF, it was delicious!

After polishing off the Verve and Moet, we moved on to vodka and beer. Although we were going to leave for the Towers at 11ish, we didn’t get out the door until half-past midnight as we were just having too much fun.

The original plan was to jump into two cabs, but as the Shipper had his truck with him, we took an impromptu ride to the Four Floors in the back of it! That was so much fun and we got some strange looks from other drivers ha ha. I guess it didn’t help that we were a little bit, shall we say, loud?

I didn’t realize how drunk we all were until I saw the photos Huney had posted up. I would show them to you all, but it’s too embarrassing! Besides which, I don’t think the other five would forgive me for sending them out. There were lots of “OH MY GAWDS!” flying around when we looked at the pics! As they say, what goes on at the Towers, stays at the Towers!

Needless to say, P and I had whacking hangovers on Sunday. As I will be in a gorgeous antique white silk dress for the wedding, I do not intend to drink too much. Famous last words? Check back here next week to find out!

What a Nice Surprise!

2007-11-09T14:50:00.000+08:00

Today when I went to the ATM to withdraw some money, I got a shock, albeit a good one. I had $1k more than expected in my bank balance!

My lovely friend Twist, whom I've known for almost 10 years, sent me the money as a wedding present! Thank you thank you thank you.

I am veeeeeeeeeeeery lucky to have such great friends who love me so much! Oh, and whom I love in return of course!!

The Season of Collecting

2007-11-09T08:35:00.000+08:00

The decorations on our small island’s main shopping street are up and so, I decided to get myself organized and decorate my Christmas tree as well! Perhaps inspiring some of you to do the same?

I have amassed a rather large collection of decorations over the years and is my wont, everything I have is either handmade or hand blown. It’s a joke amongst P and my friends that if you put the word ‘hand’ in front of anything, I’ll buy it! I am a self-confessed snob who just cannot tolerate cheap and ugly things, unlike some people I used to know. ;-D

One of my favourite items is this simple but stunning nativity scene:

The German makers only produce a limited number per year and this set was ‘sponsored’ a few years ago. Just as well really as it is the same price as the silk footstool! Ouch. But I didn’t pay for it so that’s okay.

I love the smell of real pine trees but as they can be a pain and I will be busy over the next few weeks with overseas friends coming for the wedding, I decided to put this up instead:

The wooden decorations are from Germany and Finland, while the crystal snowflake is Swarovski of course. P’s and my first Christmas was in 2006 and he bought me the entire collection of 12 wooden Star of David ornaments with various little figurines in them, which I just love!

On my sofa are silk Santa cushion covers from Jim Thompson bought on my last trip to Bangkok in 2004:

As I have some friends coming over this weekend for champagne and curry (I know, odd, but our group IS a mix of East and West!), I also decided to decorate the guest bathroom with my other Swarovski pieces and a tiny handmade wooden train.

The reindeer and tree sits on the soap stand in the shower. Cute huh!

The rest of the decorations are spread out in the kitchen:

Dining table:

Hall:

And finally, in the master bedroom, I have this angel pyramid that P bought for me. He says it reminds him of me because I’m such an angel. Got you! Bet you guys almost believed me for a moment ha ha ha. He did buy it for me, but an angel is the last thing I would remind him of. His nickname for me is Princess, quite appropriate I think!

And until next time, Princess ooooooout!!

Another Fruitful Weekend

2007-10-29T10:38:00.000+08:00

As usual, this past Saturday and Sunday just flew by! I did a lot and don’t feel rested at all, story of my life…

I had a Christmas-themed scrapbooking class on Saturday where I made an ornament, card and photo frame (the last was sent out in the email):

A fun class but fiddly, the devil being in the detail. But as I love all things yuletide, I had a great time and now have a hand-made Christmas card for P!!

In a quest to diversify our assets, I have also found a painting to invest in titled ‘Alone’. As we can’t really afford it at the moment, the gallery owner has kindly allowed me to pay for it by instalments! After I committed to buying it, two more people came in and offered him more money. But too late, it was already mine ha ha! That of course, has made me very happy because it means that the painting is saleable.

It is a very large piece with a woman sitting with her back to you showing her side profile. It is semi-abstract figurative, with lots of negative space using whites, pale yellows, black, light and dark greys and a slash of red.

The funny thing is that although I bought another piece of art from this gallery over three years ago, I haven’t been in since. However, something literally pulled me into the gallery that day and when I saw HER up on the wall, I fell in love instantly. Some paintings of women’s figures are too ‘in your face’ or worse, twee. ‘Alone’ is a strong piece but pleasing and is just plain gorgeous. I will post a photo of it once it is hanging up in my living room!

The gallery owner plans on bringing the artist of ‘Alone’ to London next year. If his paintings are successful in Europe, then mine will definitely go up in value: $ker-ching$!

Eventually, I would like to a proper collection of work by up and coming artists from Asia. Although I may not have a lot of knowledge about art at the moment, I do intend to learn. And I also have something else that can’t be taught: an eye for quality and an ability to recognize potential. So exciting!

Focused on the Future

2007-10-26T10:39:00.001+08:00

In spite of the fact that P and I had a falling out with his mum last week, life ain’t so bad. This incident made me realize what a great man I have in P. Although things are still unresolved with my FMIL (that's future mother-in-law and not another F word like some of you might think!), I am actually okay with it because I know without a doubt that P will always back me up no matter what.

I also received a very nice present in the post this week. My German friend sent us a voucher for a couple’s massage and nourishing frangipani soak at one of the most exclusive spas in Mayfair, London! My eyes almost bugged out when I found out how much it cost and I can’t wait to use it when I’m over there for the holidays. Who knows? We may even run into some celebrities! After the stress of getting the wedding organized, the spa treatment will be bliss. Thank you very much, DE friend!

I know I’m lucky to have P and true friends who sincerely love and care about me. So many people accept sorry excuses for friends, just because they either don’t want to be lonely or they can’t get any better. P and I have done a lot of cleaning out of useless ‘hangers on’ this past year and I have to say that life is a lot more pleasant these days. Life is stressful enough without so-called ‘friends’ sucking up your energy and money!

On the topic of money, we are focused on building a life together and have decided that from now on, instead of buying each other gifts (he buys me diamonds, I buy him t-shirts!), our presents will be either cash, stocks/shares or carefully chosen art pieces that will appreciate in value. Although we have not been frivolous with money this year, we have spent a lot on my apartment, travel and the wedding. It is time to add to our assets and I for one, cannot wait to get started!

Mother-in-laws: I need one like I need a hole in the head!

2007-10-16T12:02:00.000+08:00

As if planning for the wedding without P’s help wasn’t stressful enough, his mother is also being a rude pain in the hiney.

The wedding draws closer every day and I am doing my best to organize the last minute details without self-combusting. My dad’s partner Leila has been a great help, taking over the details like flowers and the wedding cake. Leila, her sister, niece and grandniece are making the decorations by hand. She has even picked my bridal bouquet for me and I’m grateful for her support. Left to my own devices, I would probably show up with some week-old carnations bought from the local petrol station! Hello, even my dress was bought off ebay!

We have friends flying in from all over the world: the US, UK, Denmark and even France. Coordinating schedules and activities hasn’t been easy. However, as I want to make sure that we all get to meet up, I drew up a activity list of what we’d be doing in the evenings and where we would be. I sent it out to the wedding party and our overseas guests with this message:

Hi All,

Attached please find the draft activities for the wedding week. Should you have any queries, please feel free to contact me! Thanks again for being a part of our special day!

Of course, they are not compulsory except for the wedding party involved in the wedding rehearsal. But family obligations mean that family flying from overseas should make the time for us... ;-)

A completely tongue-in-cheek email from a very happy bride. However, I received back this email from P’s mum, which totally made my jaw drop:

I do realise that it is very important to you and P, your wedding day and the activities beforehand, but also you must understand that those of us coming from overseas as you put it, are spending a lot of money on flights and coming a long way, and also have minds of our own, and although wish to spend time with you and your family, also would like to do things ourselves, and spend time with those we have not seen for two years.

I was totally shocked when I read that. As far as I’m aware, I have been nothing but generous to P’s family. But I guess I shouldn’t really be surprised at her ‘slap on the hand’ reaction. When I visited them in Oz in March, I found that his mother was very cold, a bitter old woman. Maybe she doesn’t like that her son is marrying a strong woman or she’s really not that happy with her lot in life. Who really knows?

All I do know is that P's family has given me nothing but stress. His sister had asked during my visit if his two nieces could be flower girls and against my better judgment, I said yes. Leila went to the trouble and expense of sourcing two very nice dresses and a couple of months ago, his parents told us that his nieces were not coming because they could not afford it!

That is the biggest joke I have ever heard, because I know that when they moved from Brringland to Oz, P gave them a substantial amount of his savings, more than the deposit I put on my flat.

To pull the money card is really rich, especially when it is their only son who is getting married. If you want to talk about spending a lot of money, let me clarify that his parents have not contributed a single cent to the wedding. P, myself, my dad, Leila and her family are the ones who are paying for the wedding.

The money his parents are spending are on their own flight tickets!! My friends coming from overseas are also doing that so what make's P's parents so special? As far as I can see, it is their arrogance that makes them stand out. What I am offended about is the fact that P's mum hasn't added one positive thing to the celebrations and then has the audacity to write such a 'nose in the air' email.

As for travelling a long way? Give me a break. I have two friends flying over 24-hours from the west coast of the US. If you want to talk about far, THAT'S far! Not some poxy seven-hour flight from Oz.

P's parents presence will not be missed and I have told his mum as much. If I never saw that silly woman again, it would be too soon.

I do not need this extra aggravation and to make myself smile, I found a great website for mother-in-law jokes. I can really relate to them and especially love the Q&A ones!

I know that this is hard for P and I’m honestly very sorry that he has to deal with this a month before the wedding. However, at the end of the day, I just will not put up with her underhanded behaviour and insidious remarks. She can behave like a brat with her own husband, but certainly not with mine and most definitely not with me.

I Have My Silk Footstool!!

2007-10-12T10:49:00.000+08:00

I would like to say thank you to my childhood friend living in Elvisland. She kindly bought me the silk footstool that I was coveting as a housewarming/wedding present! Thanks so much!!

I am really very touched by her generosity and that she went to all the trouble to get the money transferred to me this week. We have known each other since 1979, when we were on the same swim team at our country club.

I had actually gone back to the same shop to see a new footstool for $99 that had just come in, but it just wasn't the same. It would have been like settling for the ugly friend when what you actually wanted to do was take the pretty girl home! I would rather have gone without than accept less than the best. But fortunately, my friend saw me right.

Even if P wouldn't sacrifice his food for me this month and my dad ignored my pleas for a housewarming gift, at least I know that somebody out there (even if she is all the way in the land of the brave) REALLY loves me! Thanks again, hee hee...

Good Job, Babe!

2007-10-11T11:54:00.000+08:00

I know that I’ve said this before, but time really is flying by. I can hardly believe that we are in the last quarter of 2007 and that P has been in his job for three months.

He told me yesterday that they have shortened his six-month probation and that he was confirmed this week! To me, that can only mean that he’s doing well, so I’m certainly very proud of him.

Tomorrow will also be exactly one year since I met P at the ‘salubrious’ Four Floors of Wh*res! It is a bit of a joke amongst our friends as how many people can say that they met the love of their lives at a wh*rehouse?!

When I asked P how he could tell that I wasn’t a working girl, he said, “Well, you were the only woman in there wearing a cardigan!” That night, I'd gone for a drink right after work so was in my office gear of formal black trousers and a long-sleeved wraparound Kenzo jersey top. Yeah I know: I'm a brand-conscious name-dropping snob ha.

Anyway, this blog entry was supposed to be about P, but I am back to talking about me, me, ME again surprise, surprise!

Well, we will be having a combi hen-stag night with our friends soon at the Four Floors and will try to recapture the drunken spirit of a year ago!

Anyway, TGTF!

Monday Bleurgh

2007-10-08T09:31:00.000+08:00

I still don’t understand why the work week draaaaaaaaaaags by so slowly while Saturday and Sunday race past in a blurr.

This weekend was no different. As I had the workmen in most of Saturday and was out running errands on Sunday, I don’t feel relaxed at all.

I had dinner with my dad and his friends at the country club on Saturday night. I calculated that the average age of my dinner companions was 62.6 years. I’m the last of the great party animals, go me! Having said that, they are all very nice guys and it was a good evening. Later on, they came by to look at my new apartment. One of them saw this:

And said, “That’s not a pool, that’s a longkang (Malay for drain)!” Well, he's 75 and I think at that age, you can say pretty much what you darn well please!

True, our condo's swimming pool is not big. Two slim people or one American (joke joke) can do laps at the same time. But it's always lovely and warm and I try to go for a swim every weekend.

I finally got a Balinese wall light plus a very reasonably priced outdoor table for my balcony. This is where I have breakfast every morning:

Nice, huh! Life could be worse I guess…

The Object of My Desire

2007-10-04T10:50:00.000+08:00

is a $599 footstool upholstered in 100% silk…

Have you guys ever wanted something beautiful and expensive, but completely impractical?

For the last couple of months, I have had my eye a gorgeous piece of furniture, but I haven’t bought it because there were more pressing priorities in my new apartment.

Now that the blinds are in and the hooks have been hung up behind the bathroom doors, my mind has wandered back to the footstool of my dreams. I have fantasies of coming home after a hard day’s work, and resting my pretty pins on woven silk made up of muted shades of pale blues, browns and cream.

The only thing stopping me from rushing out and buying it now is that the choice for October is either the footstool or food. I could dip into my savings to make this one last little purchase (note to self: do NOT do this), but then it would never end. The next things I would want would be a silk Persian rug (at least $5,000), Swarovski champagne glasses with crystal-filled stems ($600 for a pair), etc. Why oh why do I have such expensive taste?

I wish I could be one of those people who could be happy with mismatched furniture made of mdf and ‘no name’ sofas. Instead, I have filled my apartment with customized teak furniture and hand-embroidered linen bed covers. Even my living room curtain ties are 100% silk batik from Bali. If you think that’s extravagant, listen to this: I use Hermes scarves to tie back the curtains in my bedroom!

So, back to my internal battle of footstool vs food. I have also asked P to eat less this month and to send me another 200 quid. So far, he ain’t biting (no pun intended). Therefore, it seems like I will have to make the ultimate sacrifice and forego food until my next salary, which I will get in three weeks’ time.

However, I am an optimist and maybe something else will come up. My dad still hasn’t bought me a housewarming present (never mind the sum of money he gave me last year, that was last year hee hee).

Also, I have raised quite a few thousand for cancer charities over the past 12 months, so perhaps one of you out there will have a heart and drive a “Buy Jan a Silk Footstool” campaign?

I live in hope…

I Need a Weekend

2007-10-01T11:13:00.000+08:00

To recover from my weekend!

It is Monday morning and I am absolutely exhausted, stiff and suffering from heatstroke. As a soon-to-be-married woman, you’d have thought that the pace of life would slow down a bit, but that’s not happening at all. In fact, it’s the opposite!

Friday Night
I went out with my colleagues for happy hour at 6.30pm. Five hours later, we were still knocking back lye chee martinis. I finally staggered home with a pounding headache and passed out after gulping down three glasses of water.

Saturday Morning
I was up not-so-bright but early for a company bowling tournament. Imagine being in a noisy and crowded bowling alley with the sound of pins crashing over your hangover. Our all-female “Dim Sum Bowlies” were in the next lane to the best team in the company, the all-male “Devil Swingers” (I think it refers to the motion of the bowling arm and not to spouse swapping). That alone should give you an indication of things to come.

The DSB gals did a good job of polishing the drains. My score over three games was 89, 103 and then 62. I got everything from zeros to strikes so consistency is not my middle name. During the last set, the guys from team DS told me that the ball was bowling me and not the other way around. Our team was so bad that the DS boys even gave us tips! In the end, they came in first and we came in last out of 21 teams. But a great morning was had by all and we had so much fun. What our team lacked in skill and stamina, we made up for with a can-do attitude and lots of laughter!

Saturday Afternoon
When I got home, I hoped to sleep off my alcoholic fug, but my inconsiderate neighbour on the 9th floor had her contractor in. He was drilling and hammering after the official renovation work hours. I went up and politely asked her to get him to stop, but she refused even when the building supervisor talked to her. Simple solution: I threatened to call the police and miraculously, there was no need for any more renovation work! The way I see it is this: if I can’t have the quiet to enjoy my afternoon nap, then she’s not going to have any peace either. (): -)

Saturday Night
It was Huney’s 25th birthday so my good friend Yeller Fever and I had drinks at my place before heading over to her party. We are older than Huney and her friends by at least 10 years, all former international school students who are very polished and intellectual. They stood around making conversation and sipping their drinks while Yeller Fever and I burned up the dance floor! We may be old(er), but we're certainly not boring!

Sunday Morning
The last bike hash I went to was in May, so I realized that five months off the saddle and no exercise in between meant I had to take it easy.

I had also invited my neighbour, the young JC to come along. He and his friend, the young Key Wee, who lives across the street from us, decided to cycle from where we live to the hash’s starting point. That wouldn’t have been a bad idea except that it was an additional hour’s ride under the scorching sun, they were both out late on Saturday night and they had never done the bike hash before!

The ride was pretty uneventful (for me anyway), although our group got caught up in a motor cross competition and a bike fell on my dad! Luckily, he escaped with just a few scratches on his legs after shouting at the guy to, “Get your bike off me, you idiot!” ha ha ha. Am I my father's daughter or what?!

I took all the short cuts that were possible and rode back pretty comfortably after a couple of hours. I found the young JC sprawled under a tree, red-faced, dehydrated and not up to social niceties. The young KW came back shortly afterwards and he wasn’t in much better shape either. Although the two boys are fit, the sun here is so strong that it can make you really ill. No matter how much fluid you drink, it never seems to be enough. Wisely, they called taxis for the journey home.

Sunday Evening
My ex-boss and her husband came over for drinks and then we went out for dinner. As it was a school night, we went home quite early. I realized while I was getting ready for bed that my shoulders were completely pink and sore. After the ride, I had changed from a long-sleeved tee into a tank top as it was so hot. Although I stood under a tree, I still got burnt.

I didn’t sleep very well as I was sweating even with the air-con on. I was nauseous and had to keep getting up to drink water.

I smsed the young JC this morning and he is in the same state as I am. Worse of all, he’s on a business trip. At least I can just collapse quietly at my desk while trying not to yawn too conspicuously. Is it Friday yet?!!

The Insatiable Pile of Bricking

2007-09-27T09:50:00.000+08:00

Although the joy of living in my own space still hasn’t diminished (and I hope it never does), the reality of being a homeowner is that it does hit your bank balance pretty hard.

Contrary to what some people might think, my dad did NOT buy me this apartment (I wish!!). I paid for the down payment through selling something that I owned and by working hard all these years. He was generous enough to give me a bit of money last year to furnish the place, but I invested it along with my other savings. Luckily the market experienced a bull run, and I then used the returns (thankfully not having to touch my principal) to buy fixtures and fittings for the apartment.

I am an avid list maker and had budgeted for what I thought was all I needed to spend. However, as this is my first home, I know now that I really didn’t have a clue as to how much it would all be. As I have said before, there have been so many unexpected costs and they keep on coming!

I have thus come up with a budget for myself until the end of the year and in conclusion, I can say hand-on-heart that I will not be:

1. Buying new clothes, shoes or handbags,
2. Eating at restaurants,
3. Partying outside of happy hour and
4. Taking taxis

In the foreseeable future, if ever again! So if you guys want to see me, you’ll have to pay for my meal and drinks unless we go to a hawker centre. I wish I was joking, but I’m not!

Is all the sacrifice worth it? To me, that would be a definite YES. To achieve and maintain something of value takes work. I am not the type of person who looks for a quick fix or to other people to bail me out. Although I love to spend money, I have never been in debt before, having always been careful not to spend more than I earn. Well, that's gone out the window now! Although some people have said that a mortgage doesn't count ha ha.

P has been great in offering to pay for some bills, which has helped, but the apartment has a voracious appetite that seems to know no end!

P said something to me the other day that struck a cord: That my new home to me is like I am to him. You love it with all of your heart, but it just keeps taking without regard for your feelings and costs you so much money!

Well, you know what they say: what goes around comes around. So now I know how he feels!

Note to self: Be much more appreciative of P from now on.

A Typical Saturday

2007-09-24T09:16:00.000+08:00

7.00am: Wake up to the sounds of birds chirping, draw open curtains, lay back in bed and enjoy the view of “my” big tree and watch the sun rise.

7.30am: Make coffee and prepare (take out of fridge and microwave) breakfast. Get back into bed. Eat.

9.00am: Walk to favourite new hang out, the neighbourhood wet market, and buy big juicy grapes and fresh flowers

10.00am: Change into cute pink Brazilian bikini and go for a swim in the condo’s lap pool which is always warm as it catches the sun the entire day

11.00am: Run bath, scatter rose petals, slap on a face mask, condition hair, lay back in stone tub and relax

2.00pm: Attend scrapbook class to make French tunnel book (should be renamed French torture book, fiddly and takes about eight hours to complete)

6.00pm: Go for dinner with scrapbook friends

9.00pm: Get into bed and talk on the phone to P

11.00pm: Snuggle down into 100% feather pillows and fall asleep thinking that I’m the luckiest girl alive!

Reality check:
Of course I also have to pay the bills and do boring chores like the laundry but that just doesn’t sound as fun, does it?

For All My Single Girlfriends

2007-09-19T17:00:00.000+08:00

Now as you all know, living in my new place has been great. In addition, I had mentioned meeting my upstairs neighbour in an earlier blog entry, a very nice British guy. Now that I've settled in properly and have some time, I can tell you more about him.

New to our Small Island, he is in his early 30s, single and bears a striking resemblance to the young John Cusack but with slightly smaller eyes and ears that stick out. A couple of my girlfriends have seen him and agreed that he’s definitely a cutie!

As a “born again” engaged woman and out of the generosity of my heart, I would like to set one of you up with this handsome young(ish) man. However, I have tried hooking people up before and it has always failed. They end up liking someone else other than the person I tried to introduce them too!

So to prevent this sort of inconvenient cross wires, I am thinking of inviting him to the wedding so that you can ALL meet him! Those of you who send me nice presents beforehand will definitely have paved an easier road as I’ll put in a good word for you. Naturally, the more expensive the present, the better the word!

But you guys had better be quick because the mother from the Canadian Family also has some of her single friends in mind for the young JC! I have told him of our plans to set him up so he has been warned.

See you all soon and have a WONDERFUL week!

Happy One-Week Anniversary!

2007-09-14T11:38:00.000+08:00

Well, it’s been a full week since I moved into my own apartment and so far it’s been wonderful. I’m still in Mary Poppins mode!

The decking and shoe cupboard have been installed, as have the curtains in the two bedrooms and living area. A very big THANK YOU to my dad for supervising the renovations so that I didn't have to take time off work.

There are still a few home improvements needed, but I’m going to enjoy just being there for now. P’s dad is a contractor and what’s the point of having this skill in the family if you don’t use it? He will be flying into our small island for the wedding, but I also want to tell him, "Don’t forget to bring your power drill!"

I have tried to keep the deco simple in order not to clutter things up, and I think it looks lovely and very 'zen'. However, instead of going on and on about what a wonderful place it is as I am apt to do (just ask P), I will just let the photos do the talking.

The front door and entrance area:

As you come in, the dining corner is on your left and the kitchen is on your right. The door leading off the dining area is for the master bedroom:

Through the kitchen is the wash area and store room/bomb shelter:

To the left of the kitchen is the balcony and living room:

These are some photos of the view taken on the balcony moving from left to right:

The second smaller bedroom is next to the living area, which I’m leaving empty for the moment:

Then the guest bathroom:

Furthest away from the kitchen and living area is the master bedroom:

And my master bathroom with the stone tub and rain shower:

To give you a better overall idea, this is the floor plan:

It is so small that I can plug the vacuum into one socket and clean my entire 807 square feet of perfection! Luckily I'm small(ish) too, so it has all worked out beautifully....

Superb Sundays!

2007-09-10T08:34:00.000+08:00

In case you guys can’t tell, I am in 7th (floor) heaven! This morning, I woke up to gentle sunshine streaming through my bedroom window and a feeling of pure joy. The sun stays till about lunch time and in the afternoon, it visits my living room.

Feeling adventurous, I got out of bed and decided to explore a little bit of my new neighbourhood. I called my dad as he and my stepmum live just around the corner from me. I’m sure they’ll loathe that when I show up yet again for another home cooked dinner! He gave me directions to the wet market, which is only a 10-minute walk away.

This neighbourhood still has little touches of past times. At the corner of the block, I heard the sweet sound of birds twittering. As I walked by the bird shop, the distinctive smell of feathers and seed reminded me of when I was young and my parents would take me to the wet market to choose a pet. Invariably, I would always try to handle the birds once I got them home and they would die shortly afterwards. Go figure!

As I crossed the street, I looked up and saw a beautiful piece of architecture on one of the shop houses with colourful peacocks:

When I reached the market, I was pleased to find many shops selling fresh meats, fish, vegetables and all sorts of provisions. As I don’t cook and have no intention of doing so in my pristine little oasis, I headed straight to the flower section, where I picked up eight gorgeous stems of yellow orchids for only 50 cents each! And even if I do say so myself, they look pretty darn good on my living room bay window sill:

A friend called me this morning and asked if I even left the apartment yet ha ha. Of course I have, but only to run inevitable errands. She is going to come over this evening and we’ll crack open a bottle of champagne to celebrate!

I feel like a new, improved version of me. P said to me yesterday that I sound like a different person. It’s true. I have been so depressed the last few months as I felt trapped living in that horrible situation. Work is stressful enough as it is and a person’s home should be a place of rest. But as I would walk up to the apartment door, my heart would drop if I saw that the living room light was on, meaning that someone was at home. Thankfully, I can leave all of that behind me now. What it has shown me is that if I can help it, I do not want to share my living space with anyone other than P from now on.

I feel like I’m in a Mary Poppins movie and find myself breaking out into song and dancing around the apartment for no apparent reason. And when I’m washing dishes and looking at my view of the construction site, I start to grin inanely and feel like my heart is going to burst with happiness! Corny I know and P has said that as a happy person, I am extremely annoying as I’m on such a high and can only talk about my property ha ha.

It’s been great sharing the experience of owning my own place with my ZA friend on the 10th floor. He is visiting for a week to set the apartment up and will go back to ZA in two days. We had some friends and colleagues over last night and they noticed that our washing machine, fridge, TV and lights are all pretty much the same! It has worked out well because I did all the research and legwork before he came over. And as I had to work this past week, he stayed here to ensure the goods were delivered and the lights installed for both our apartments. Now that’s teamwork!

Time is just racing past and in less than 10 weeks’ time, P and I will be getting married. I haven’t even chosen the bridal flowers yet! Better tell my stepmum to standby as she and her sister are helping me choose them. They have offered to pay for the table decorations as I am too cheap to do so! I want to spend all of P’s money on alcohol hee.

Anyway, have a great week everyone, I know I am!

Lights, Washing Machine, Move!

2007-09-04T10:11:00.000+08:00

Over the last few weeks, I’ve come to realize that owning your first home is a tiring but exhilarating experience. By sheer coincidence, one of my friends from ZA bought the 10th floor apartment (mine is lucky number seven) in the same stack for investment purposes. It’s been fun to share the joy (and financial pain)!

Last night, we went to choose lights and managed to keep it at around the $1,000 mark for the entire flat each.

There is already someone living on the 14th floor, the lone resident for the moment. We went up to meet him, a friendly guy from London. It was nice to see the completed apartment, which he is renting from a local gal who lives in Russia.

I will be very busy over the next few weeks getting things sorted but it is all good. I am so looking forward to moving into my gorgeous apartment and enjoying my own space!

Eye on London

2007-08-29T17:02:00.000+08:00

I can't believe that I am more than halfway through my trip to visit P and time is just racing by. It's been great to see him and the weather has been wonderful.

We went on the Eye on Sunday and here are a few photos:

Monday was a Bank Holiday so P had the day off. We went out to Bromley to see some good friends of mine. Their two little girls are cuuuuute! The oldest one at three looks just like mummy (who's German) and the one-year-old looks like daddy (who is Chinese). They made us lobster noodles and we spent the afternoon quaffing champagne and stuffing pavlova with cream and berries down our gobs. Tough life!

On the down side (isn't there always one?), I found that two of my cashmere sweaters which P had put in his closet had been eaten by moths! On closer inspection, I discovered that the rug by the front door had been chomped on, as had his flatmate's coats hanging next to it! I spent yesterday cleaning the flat from top to bottom and P helped me do the bathroom when he came back from work.

I am a bit of a neat freak but the apartment was not the cleanest. I don't know how people can live like this. I don't blame P as he has only been here for a few weeks, but his flatmate really needs to find out what a Hoover is and how to use it!

Anyway, I guess it gives me something to whinge about and now I have something else to hold over P's head hee hee.

Today I had lunch with one of the guys from our London office, then met P for coffee afterwards. Things in the city are not cheap, with a plate of fish and chips for £6, that is $18! I'm used to noodles for one pound, which are tasty and a whole lot healthier. I also notice that there are a lot of fat people here, so they must be making a lot of money as food is so expensive.

Anyway, I only have two full days left here, so I will make the best of them and enjoy my vacation. The next few months will be flat out with the move and the wedding and I will be glad when I'm more settled.

Until the next entry, bye bye from London!

Saving Money and Spending It Again

2007-08-26T14:07:00.000+08:00

In a bid to save P $700 on my flight to Brringland, I trawled the www for a cheap deal. Having found a return ticket for $1,343 (vs a direct flight on Small Island Airways for over $2,100) on my desired dates, I was overjoyed.

Alas, my happiness was but a fleeting. In my excitement, I forgot to do the most important thing of all: read the fine print! I had misread the itinerary and thought I would only have one stopover on a Neighbouring Small Island. It was only after I'd paid for the ticket that I realized that there would be an additional stopover in Oil Country and that the 12-hour direct flight would take me over 24-hours of door-to-door travel!

However, when a friend asked what I would do if I had the choice of sitting at an airport whiling away the hours or sitting at my desk at work, I suddenly found myself optimistic again. It's amazing how effective a reality check can be!

With the upcoming wedding and moving into my new apartment next month, P and I need to save as much money as we can.

He is helping me with my mortgage (I am so glad I took a chance on this 'beachcomber' ha ha) but I still have so much to pay for. Besides furniture and appliances, I also have to shell out for curtains, lights and an unexpected cost: wooden decking to convert my planter into a small balcony. Tell me all you seasoned home owners, will the surprises ever end?!

Nevertheless, I am still very happy and now that I've had a few days to get used to the idea of my new home, I am really getting excited. Or more so than I was before, if that is possible.

I now find myself sitting in the flat that P has rented with the opera singer in the middle of London. I was so jetlagged yesterday but feel much better after a good night's sleep. It looks to be a lovely day today (if a touch overcast) and we are heading to the London Eye, and then lunch with my ex-hubby after.

Tomorrow, we are going to Bromley to spend the afternoon with some other close friends.

So watch this space for photos and more updates!

I Got the Keys!!

2007-08-23T15:19:00.000+08:00

As of today, I am officially the proud owner (okay 20%) of a lovely little flat in the city!!

I plan on moving in mid-September, although there is a lot to do in the meantime. Wow, home ownership, what a great feeling!!

My Dad: Current Media Darling

2007-08-23T11:10:00.000+08:00

It seems that I can’t turn around without seeing my dad in the media these days!

1. I was at work yesterday when our pantry lady came up to me with the Chinese newspaper and said, “Isn’t this your dad?” Lo and behold, there he was, this time was carrying his bicycle with a big grin on his face!

I’m not sure exactly what the article says, as my Mandarin sucks oranges, but I’m sure it is along the lines of what an amazing 70-year-old he is to have cycled 900km in a week, etc!

2. This morning, another colleague who is also a good friend, said to me, “Hey, is this your dad in the newspaper again?” And there he was, featured in the file photo for a reader’s letter in the same paper that had published his photo at the weekend!

3. Next week, he will be interviewed on a prime time morning news programme along with two other senior citizens. I will miss it as I’ll be in Brrrringland, but I’m sure I’ll catch a recording of it at some point.

I don’t even have to make a dinner appointment to see him anymore as he is ubiquitous! Everywhere I look, there he is!!

Not Bad for an Old Coot!

2007-08-19T07:33:00.000+08:00

Although my dad and I don't always get along, we figure it's because we are so similar. He has told me on many occasions that I am 'just like him'. Sometimes, I see his impatience e.g. with cars on the road and his reaction in comments and/or hand gestures and I think to myself, "Oh my god, that is me!". Scary!

One positive trait we do share though, is that when we set our minds to something, we go for it 100%. Right now, I am into scrapbooking and have thrown myself totally into this hobby. As for my dad, it is his cycling.

Since the beginning of this year, he has trained hard for a 900km ride from the top end of our neighbouring country down to our small island. The ride was scheduled for the second week of August. He cycled almost everyday and trained with his group regularly. He even had overnight sessions over a few Saturdays, causing him to miss P's and my engagement dinner! Now that is commitment.

Anyway, I was in my scrapbook class yesterday morning when I received a text from a friend asking me if it was my dad in the newspaper. None of my classmates had the paper but one of them spotted a customer in the scrapbook shop who did, so I accosted the guy who gladly gave his copy to me!

There on page 4 was my old man in all his glory (newspaper article attached in email). It was a very cool pic of him crossing the finish line after the week-long race. At almost 70, he was the oldest member of the entire group of 40+ people. They cycled between 100 - 150km every single day. Not something I would voluntarily choose to do, but undeniably impressive anyway. He is incredibly fit and I must say that I felt a frisson of pride when I saw the article.

Well done, Dad!

Who Me?

2007-07-24T10:44:00.000+08:00

For the last month or so, we’ve had an intern at the office from “Croak Croak”. For the past few weeks, I’ve had to look at his ugly black Darth Vader bear every time I walk by his desk, which is next to the CEO’s office. I’ve been wanting to say or do something about the hideous thing, but never had the opportunity.

Anyway, I finally had a chance to get into some mischief last Friday afternoon when Young Croak went for a smoke. I grabbed his bear, hung it up by a lanyard and pinned it to his work space partition with a little note. Here is the result:

When he came back from his cigarette break and saw it, he immediately looked at me. I wonder how he could have figured that out so quickly hee hee. I never admitted to playing the practical joke, though when I tried to take the bear down, he wouldn’t let me as he wanted the CEO to see it! I knew that it definitely wouldn’t have been a wise career move so I bided my time. Young Croak’s weakness is that he needs his nicotine and I know that he has to go downstairs for a fix on a regular basis.

I didn’t have to wait long. The next time he went out, I rushed over to his desk, took down the evidence of my handiwork and put the bear back to where it had originally been standing. Ah, but I left him a little hint of “who done it”:

I love Fridays! Innocent smile...

What I Want vs. What I Should Do

2007-07-17T14:11:00.000+08:00

I have really been feeling jaded these past few weeks and I am at that point where I would like to jack it all in and move to be with P. Unfortunately, I have responsibilities here e.g. my apartment will be ready in the next month or two (fingers crossed as I can't wait to get my hands on it!) and I need to get things sorted out. I realize that once you own a property, you are no longer “footloose and fancy free”. I can’t just up and leave as I have to oversee its furnishing and eventual rental.

But it is not just the property that holds me back. Although P has started his new job, I do not want to give up work before I have the right to do so in London. And this will not happen until we are married and I have the proper visa in place. It is a drag and I hate being without him. I do have friends here that I go out with, but it’s just not the same as having my best friend and soul mate with me on a daily basis. I am really missing the person who in a large part, keeps me sane (or as sane as I can expect to be under the circumstances).

I miss being young and carefree and a few years ago, I would have given up my life and dashed off to London just because I wanted to. Now, I am tied down by brick, mortar and a sense of responsibility. When did I wake up and get so old?

On the family front, things have settled down since my last blog entry, but I still feel that I have nothing in common with them. My aunt and I have spoken and we have decided that although things were said in the heat of the moment and there are no hard feelings, we will take a bit of a time out. We are in very different places in life and sometimes, it’s good just to get on and deal with what we need to. Her focus is on her sick sister, and my focus is on P and the future that we are building together.

My dad has also made arrangements to have dinner with me this week but I wonder if we really have anything genuine to say to each other? One small word can set both of us off and I guess we just have different expectations. The years where I needed a father were from when I was 0 to 21. Now my needs have changed and my family has not been my base for a long time. Before I met P, I was my own rock. For many years, the only person I could rely on was me as my family was busy starring in their own melodrama.

To add stress on top of everything else, there are also constant power struggles at work which I have to try to avoid. And while most of the wedding has already been organized, there are always bits and pieces popping up all the time and no, it doesn’t always run smoothly. So I am a little tired and am definitely on a very short fuse. I find myself becoming rather intolerant of both my family and friends and know that I definitely need to take a breather to get centered again.

I am conscious of whinging about my situation instead of doing something about it. However, instead of jumping from the frying pan into the fire, I have given myself a few weeks to think things through. I am sure that I will feel much better once I am living in my own apartment and can enjoy the fruit of all my years of work. And if I know that my place is not going to be ready until a certain point in them, then I can also make alternative plans.

Oh what I would give to be rich and to take a few months off from real life and just go shopping in Milan and Paris! Well, you can’t blame a girl for dreaming…..

What a Difference a Day Makes

2007-07-10T19:19:00.001+08:00

In the last entry, I wrote about my favourite Aunt Angela. In this entry, I have to write about my favourite Aunt Angela "who isn't very happy with me right now"!

What brought all this about? Well, I promised her that I wouldn't write about it on the blog and I will keep my word. Besides which, the issue that we caused us to disagree is not the point anyway. The thing is, my parents' generation always wants to tell us how to think and behave. If we don't agree with them, that's when problems crop up.

I have spent a lot of time questioning the dynamics within my family and these are the thoughts that come to mind.

My dad has often said that he loves me, but I realize that this is a conditional type of love. He only speaks to me when I say what he wants to hear and if for any reason I don't, he goes off in a huff! Kind of like me in a way, but hey, I'm not the parent! Their generation is so different from how we are now. I can't speak for other cultures, but for the Chinese, the elders' word is law and being filial equates doing what they wish and not talking back to them. I'm sure you guys can all see me doing that right?! Nooooooot!

I have spent nine years away from this small island, and you can't help but be influenced by your environment. During the formative ages of 16 to 21, I went to university in the City by the Bay. I had a lot of friends from all over the world and started to see life in a different light. I love being Asian, but I don't agree with everything in my culture. Blind obedience is one of them.

I absolutely detest people telling me what to do and this is the point of contention between my aunt and myself. She has told me before not to write negative things on the blog (this is not what we argued about today) but as I said to her, "Once only good things happen to me, then I will only write about good things." Life is both about the positive and negative, and you can't have one without the other. My solution is to take her off the blog's mailing list as my writing seems to cause her a lot of distress and that is definitely not what I want. In the same vein, there are some TV programmes that cause me sleepless nights so I don't watch them! Very simple really.

Many of you have told me how much you enjoy reading the blog and how funny it is. I'm sure part of why you guys think so is because I am completely honest and say exactly what I think and feel. Yes, I do have a bit of a sharp tongue at times, but I think it adds character to my personality, even if I do say so myself, ahem! ;-)

I know that my family is messed up, and I include myself in this category. I have never put it on the blog before, but P's nickname for me is "Nutty Bird" ha ha. I laugh because I know it to be true and I'm not afraid to admit to my failings and weaknesses. I am INCREDIBLY lucky to have found this man (even if it was in a wh*re house) who loves me as I am! And I thank god every day that he's in my life. He has since started his new job as the IT Manager for a multi-national financial group and that has taken some of the stress off us.

Today, I asked him if he still wanted to marry me, that it's not late for him to make his escape! He has been kept in the loop with regards to what my aunt and I argued about, and he's also well aware of the tenuous relationship I've always had with my family. I wanted to make sure that he knows what he's getting himself into and that I do come from a damaged family. He assured me that he knows FULL well how crazy we all are and that he loves me anyway. Thank goodness for that then!

When I was younger, I often wished that I didn't have the parents I did and that I had been adopted by a really nice family in Europe! Maybe I would have grown up to be a well-balanced adult and not be as abrasive as I am? Who knows? Anyway, it's too late for that now and I am just doing my best in the life that I do have.

At some point, I hope that my aunt can accept that I have my own opinions and that it is always going to be that way. Failing that, I guess we'll just have to agree to disagree!

My Cousin and Me

2007-07-08T19:27:00.000+08:00

On Friday night, I had dinner with my favourite Aunt Angela and her 12-year-old daughter Allie. When I passed over our wedding invitation card, Allie made a face when she read it and said, "Ewww, the theme is glamourous! Can I wear jeans?!"

I gave her 'the look', which meant a definite no, so we decided to go shopping the next day to try and find her a suitable dress. I love my Aunt dearly, but I know her very well. If she had her way, Allie would be in a high-necked floor-length floral dress suited for the cast of Little House on the Prairie!

I didn't realize how difficult dressing a pre-teen would be though. Allie is Eurasian and very pretty, and she'll definitely grow up to be a stunner and blow the rest of us cousins out of the water when she's a bit older. But right now, she's in that between stage where she's 'not a girl, not yet a woman'. She's smaller on top and bigger on the bottom (blame her German father ha ha) and of course hasn't grown into her real shape yet.

Being about the same size as I am and looking like a 16-year-old, I sometimes forget how young she still is. I was getting her to try on halter necks and spaghetti-strapped lingerie dresses, which of course made her feel completely uncomfortable.

We went to a few shops but just couldn't find anything that hit the right note so we sat down and had a bit of a chat. It was really sad to hear her say that she felt fat. She's definitely not a skinny girl, but she's by no means overweight. But it must seem that way to her because she comes from a family of really slim girls. The average height and weight for the female cousins is probably about 5'6 and 50kg and our aunts are even tinier. What makes it worse is that Allie is often told she's fat by the older generation.

Of course that makes her even more insecure, which I am afraid will cause her to look to food for comfort. I recognize the cycle because I have suffered from eating disorders myself. When I was 16, I weighed only 43kg (I'm now about 53kg) and thought I was fat. I spent years hating the way I looked and constantly battled an unhealthy self image. I thought I was the ugliest thing on God's great earth and it took me years to overcome this. I don't want my cousin to go through the same thing. I told Allie that she is beautiful but I don't think she believed me. Many of my friends who have met her always tell me how pretty she is, so it's definitely true.

I know that my parents' generation don't believe in praising their kids because they think it 'makes your head swell' but in fact, they have got it all wrong. Their lack of encouragement is actually what makes us more scr*wed up. It is too late for my parents to learn this, but hopefully not for others.

Anyway, we couldn't find Allie anything in the shops, but she came back to my place and tried on a red jersey dress that fit her just right. So she has taken it home and hopefully will wear it for the wedding. I've also invited her to join me whilst I get ready on the wedding day and I think we'll have a great time.

My day with Allie was unexpected and gave me some food for thought. She has always had a bit of an attitude around me, but I realize now that it's only because she is looking for attention. When it was just the two of us, we actually get along really well. I speak to her as if she's an adult because frankly, what do I know about relating to kids? I could be wrong but I really think she appreciates that I don't patronize or talk down to her. I had a really nice day and yes, I am surprised!

Service with a Smile?

2007-07-07T08:30:00.000+08:00

Sod that, make it a scowl and you might even have to pay for it if you're lucky!

What is it with lousy service at F&B establishments on our small island? Not only did we have trouble finding a venue to host our wedding dinner, it is also not proving easy to find a fun place for our guests to party afterwards.

My flatmate Rachel recently started dating a very cool guy, the Sweed, who manages an up and coming bar in the financial district. I thought it would be nice to show our support and have the post-dinner drinks at their group's other bar which is by the river. Along the same lines, the outdoor venue where we are celebrating our wedding is owned by a long-time friend of mine, and his very successful F&B group provides incredibly good service.

So when Rachel recommended this post-party place, I thought it would work out well as our wedding venue is only a short bum boat ride away. The bar is called 'the activity that people do when they have s*x with someone for one night and never see them again'. I don't understood that phrase though, as there is normally more laying down involved! At least if you are my age and have gammy knees ha ha.

Anyway, the Sweed spoke to the bar manager (for accuracy's sake, let's call him A** Hole) and Rachel followed up with an email informing him of our requirements. Basically we wanted to reserve a seating area for 20 people next to the dance floor, purchase a couple of vodka bottles, have light snacks for our guests at midnight, and for the DJ to play our first dance song, "Everything" by Michael Buble. Not too difficult you might think, but evidently more so than this expatriate bar manager can handle!

This is the first email we got back from him:

Hi the Sweed,

We can't do food for that amount so late, the kitchen closed for al la carte at 11pm, however we can provide snacks. Quite honestly with the change in menu at the moment I don't want to commit to something that I may not be able to deliver later on. The easiest thing for them to do is when they arrive to order straight off the snack menu.

For bottled spirits I can offer them a 10% discount on house pour and premium spirit bottles. No discount on the food as it isn't that costly anyway.

Cheers

A** Hole

When I first read it, I was a bit taken aback as it seemed quite abrupt and unhelpful. Rachel's and my name were clearly stated in the email but instead of addressing the paying customer i.e. me, he wrote back to the Sweed. He also did not say how much the bottles of "premium spirits" were. For all I know, they could have been US$500 a bottle and even with a 10% discount, it would still have been way too expensive. And instead of worrying about committing to a plate of chicken wings or two, he should just have forwarded the snack menu. He could easily explain that it was their current menu but that the items could change by November. It's not rocket science, but obviously too much for his alcohol and tobacco saturated (lack of a) brain to get around.

My point is further proven by the next email which I received only one day later:

Hi

A thousand apologise but I have just realised that we have an event already booked on that evening...Very sorry about that.

Good luck with your wedding and I hope you have a great day.

Regards
(Still an) A** Hole

I really do wonder how A** Hole could have gotten a job in an industry where customer service is integral to running a successful business. Either he really has the gift of the gab and has the owners/management completely fooled, or they are as braindead as he is. I have been to that bar on a Friday night and even though the rest of the Quay is pumping, this place is never at capacity. I just cannot believe that he would forget that his entire bar is booked up on the same night as our wedding, or maybe he really is that stupid?!

Needless to say, I wrote back and thanked him for his unhelpfulness and told him that with his lousy attitude, he was the one who needed the luck! Sarky I know, but I honestly think it will sail right through the vacuum between his ears.

Seriously, where do they find people like him? With foreign 'talent' like that, the bar would be better off saving their money and hiring a local. What A** Hole doesn't seem to understand is that the customer is spoilt for choice along the Quay. It is a shame because even though we are only ordering two bottles of vodka as a start, I know that our guests (who LOVE to drink) will drop at least a couple of grand if not more before the night is over.

His loss and better that I find out about his incompetence four months before the wedding rather than have a major scr*w up on the night itself! What a lucky, lucky escape. Phew!

To Sell or Not to Sell

2007-07-04T14:25:00.000+08:00

In September 2005, I was lucky enough to enter the local property market when it was at its lowest. By sheer “luck” of being in an unhappy relationship, I was looking for my escape when I bought a small two-bedroom apartment from a developer in the central part of our small island. As soon as I walked into the showflat, I knew I had to have it.

Although it would take about two years for the development to be completed, deep down I knew that it would eventually be my ticket to freedom. And even though I left the relationship long before the apartment was ready, the property has still brought me a lot of blessings.

The property market on our small island has been booming recently, with articles in the media speculating on its growth for the next year and beyond. In some ways, it almost seems like ‘panic’ buying to me as prices have risen very sharply over a very short time. It does worry me as we’ve seen from the past that there is always a boom before a bust. I would hate for the property bubble to burst as I am now a player in this sector.

There are several schools of thought floating around at the moment. Some people think that the market is already slowing down, while others believe that there is still room for growth until 2012. I would be the first to admit that I haven’t got a clue as to what will happen.

On an emotional level, I want to hang on to the apartment. It is the first home I have ever owned, although my friend DJ rudely pointed out that it still belongs to the bank! Well, they do own 80% of it, but at least I can call the balcony and bathroom my own and it is only my name on the title!

However, today I was offered a price for it which if I accepted, would give me a net return of 250% on my initial investment in under two years.

At first glance, it does look really amazing and I would be a fool not to accept the offer. But when I dig a little deeper, I realize there are other factors to consider.

If I sold my apartment now, I would never again get a property in that area for the price I paid for it. I would not be able to afford another place in a nice location until the market comes down again, and who knows that will be? As I’m unsure if the market has reached its peak, I’m also afraid of being caught in in a negative equity situation. Plus, all my money would then be invested in funds and on the stock market. And if I remember correctly, the one major rule of investing is to diversify, diversify, diversify.

I wish I had a crystal ball (don’t we all?) which I could look into to help me make the right decision.

As a wise man (who is married to an accountant) recently said to me, “You can make the right calculations, but the wrong decision.” If I go with what my heart says, it is to keep the apartment and to live in it for a while until P and I decide where we are going to settle.

It really is a beautiful seventh floor unit with lots of windows that overlooks a leafy area that has been zoned as a park. The fixtures and fittings are all very modern and stylish. There is a lap pool with a water feature at one end and the development is very close to all the facilities necessary for a convenient life i.e. restaurants, public transport, shopping, etc. It is only five minutes by car from the main shopping street.

If we should ever decide that this small island isn’t the place for us, then it should be relatively easy to rent out.

I guess since I have doubts, I won't sell and unless I’m offered an amazing amount, I’m still a property owner!

Independent Women - The Price of "Freedom"

2007-06-27T15:06:00.000+08:00

I was talking to a friend the other day, and she was sharing her laments about work. She left a great non-profit organization for a position that pays 25% more (excluding bonuses). But everything in life comes at a price and she is just not happy in her new job.

Power plays and struggles are orders of the day and regardless of how hard she tries to keep a low profile, it is virtually impossible not to be dragged into the office politics. The only way to stay out of trouble would be for her not to speak to anyone!

It sounds like a really miserable situation to me, and it got me thinking about the priorities in our lives that dictate the choices we make. My friend feels unable to leave the job because of her financial commitments. She has a fabulous apartment in the centre of town, which she has become a slave to. Though she is surrounded by modern luxury at home, she dreads going into work everyday.

She is completely ill at ease because of the tension that permeates every corner of the office. None of her colleagues feel secure in their jobs and that taints every aspect of their interactions with others. Although she tries not to let it affect her, it’s quite difficult as she constantly has to watch her back and walk on eggshells.

The way I see it is that she has one of two options. One, she can stay and suck it up. Two, she can find a job in a less stressful environment, which will also probably mean less money. Ultimately, she has to ask herself what is more important to her.

If it is her financial independence, then looking for another position that pays the equivalent will probably bring the same sort of stresses, albeit in another corporate environment.

If it is her peace of mind, then she has to make some sacrifices in the way she spends money. Or else she could take on part-time work in the evenings and at the weekends, and/or rent out her spare room.

There are advantages and disadvantages to both choices and many of us single women today have been in similar situations. Instead of having a man provide for us like our mothers or grandmothers before us, most women these days have to take care of ourselves.

I sometimes look at women who don’t have to work because their partner provides for them and I think for a second, “Ooooooo, that would be nice!” Not having to go to battle at the office every day and yet be able to buy all the gorgeous handbags and shoes in the world!

But I know myself. As I’m now “older and wiser”, I value my independence too much to give up my power and put myself in that situation. And as is the case for most of these women, the luxury lifestyle only lasts as long as the men they are with remain interested in them. It must be horrible to be beholden to someone and not being able to say what you think and do what you like because it might p*ss them off. Then your lifestyle would be taken away based solely on the whim of another person.

Inversely, if the man did something you didn't like, e.g. be unfaithful, what could you really do about it? He would just turn around and tell you to leave if you didn't like his behaviour. That would be so humiliating and I would never do that to myself.

After talking more to my friend, we’ve decided that though our lifestyles do bring their share of challenges, at least we are the masters of our own decisions. Even after P and I get married, I will work for as long as possible. That way I maintain the respect he has for me and I always have the freedom of choice.

Baby Baby Baby Part 2!

2007-06-15T12:27:00.000+08:00

No, it is still not me who is having a baby. Check out this photo though, isn’t she adorable?

She is half Burmese, a quarter Chinese and a quarter Caucasian. This photo was taken minutes after she was born and if you look carefully, you can still see some birth slime on her ha ha.

I first met the baby’s mother, the Eurasian, when I was nine. One day when I went into class, I saw a pretty nine-year-old girl sitting at one of the desks. Even then, I had a fascination with all things Western (blame TV programs like CHIPS, Starsky and Hutch, etc), so I sidled over and introduced myself. That was the start of a friendship that has spanned 28 years and counting!

When we were kids, I really looked up to her. Our parents knew each other and I used to hang out at her house all the time. I always copied whatever she did, including buying the same bikini and tying my hair the same way as hers. The other girls in our Catholic convent school used to cry when we wouldn't let them join our 'gang'! The Eurasian and I got into quite a lot of trouble as we were very naughty. I think we provided a lot of entertainment for our teachers, and if nothing else, we certainly made them work for their money!

We lost touch for a while when we were in our 20s, but fortunately ran into each other again a few years ago. Since then, we have spent some time together and I even visited her in Myanmar where she lives.

The Eurasian and I don’t always agree on everything, but our friendship is genuine and I love her for her honesty and concern. She used to nag me when I was single to find a man and settle down, but I was just having too much fun! Of course she’s happy for me now that I’m with P and has promised she’ll be there for the wedding. Girl, I’m holding you to that!

I would just like to say congratulations on your third child and much happiness for always!

Auntieeeee! (said with our local accent)

2007-06-08T23:05:00.000+08:00

A few days ago, I was chatting online with my friend in Elvisland. I told her that I was starting a scrapbooking class in July and she laughed saying, "Hey, only the 'aunties' here do that!" Well, either I've mellowed out since meeting P eight months ago, or I really am an 'auntie' now!

It's 11pm on a Friday night, and the old me would have been living it up at one of the clubs, getting happily sloshed with a vodka cranberry in hand while watching strange men get their tongues pierced .

Tonight, I took out all of my scrapbooking supplies and starting organizing photos, papers and stickers for my wedding album while cooling off with a Ribena.

When I realized what I was doing, I was so disconcerted that I had to get up and write this entry. WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO ME?!!

The answer is that after all these years, I've simply fallen in love with a man who has become my best friend. He is always on my side. It sounds like such a cliche and I'm not the romantic type, but there is no other way I can describe it. We have been through so much together, but instead of pushing us apart, the challenges have actually strengthened the bond between us.

As I write this, P is on a flight back to Brrrringland. I am very proud to say that after only six weeks of looking for a job, he was offered a position as the IT Manager for a small local company in Melbourne. But we did some tax calculating and soul searching, and concluded that it would be more prudent for him to work back home where the salaries are higher. So he turned the post down.

Although we have an idea of where we want to go, we are not making too many plans as life has a strange way of doing what it wants! We are both very excited about our future and getting married in November (hence the scrapbooking).

Without realizing it, I've somehow outgrown my old lifestyle. The things that mattered to me then, don't matter to me now. There is more I'd like to say on this, but I will keep it for another time. It's almost midnight and this 'auntie' has to haul a** and get to bed!

Life is Full of Both Happy and Sad

2007-06-01T15:08:00.000+08:00

The good news first: Clippers and 20 other women reached their goal and more when they shaved their heads on 19 May for the Children’s Cancer Foundation. Their target was S$250,000 and to date, the donations stand at S$280,000! Well done to them! This is a very cute photo of how they all look after they got their heads shaved:

On a sadder note, my dad’s sister-in-law lost her battle with lymphoma and passed away earlier this week. P and I went to the funeral yesterday with my dad and his partner. It was a quiet and dignified ceremony, which symbolized the type of woman my aunt was.

I’m sorry that I didn’t know her better, although she was always a part of my childhood visits to my grandparents’ home. She was a very private person and not many people outside of the family knew she was ill. However, she really was a fighter and though it’s a small comfort to those she left behind, they can be proud that she did the best she could.

My aunt’s immediate family and my dad’s sisters did an amazing job of looking after her during her illness and I know it has been stressful for them, especially since my dad’s baby sister is also living with liver/bone cancer.

This has again reminded me how tenuous life is and how quickly things can change. I am more determined than ever to enjoy what I have and to spend as much quality time with my dad as possible.

Do continue to keep my family in your prayers and please donate generously to all cancer charities. Thank you and lots of love!

What Planet are You On?!

2007-05-29T16:36:00.000+08:00

As most of you know from a few blog entries back (see the As the Wedding World Turns post), I had a huge disagreement with my original wedding MC, the ‘other diva’. He couldn’t understand that if you want your friends to do something for you, you ask nicely and hope that they will agree. He tried to TELL me what to do, which of course guaranteed that I did exactly the opposite!

He has still not apologized for crossing this very fine line of friendship, so the situation is status quo. As he is a proud person and unlikely to say he’s sorry, I foresee that the friendship is pretty much over. In the last nine years that I’ve known him, we have had periods where we didn’t speak for over a year due to some spat or other. I know that I’m also a high maintenance person and have no patience for his dramatics. Therefore, I am quite happy to join the loooooooooooong list of people he has fallen out with and doesn’t speak to anymore! There are a few others who have become friends with him again, but they either live in another country or don’t see him that often, which seems to be the key to being friends with him.

We still have mutual friends and he has been telling everyone his spin of the story, which is perfectly understandable. However, one of our friends told me the other day that because I’m such an upfront and direct person, he knows that my version is the one that happened. See, being brutally honest does have its uses sometimes ha ha!

What prompted me to write this entry was the fact that P ran into the ‘other diva’ today, who said he was offended that P hadn’t gotten in touch with him since arriving on our small island a week ago! As P came to see me and our time together is limited, why would he call an ex-friend of mine who has caused me nothing but grief? P told him as much, but more diplomatically of course. I guess it shouldn’t surprise me that the “other diva” still lives on Planet Princess! Some people, tsk!

Another Amazing Person Doing It!

2007-05-23T13:31:00.000+08:00

Shaving their heads for charity of course! What were you guys thinking tsk tsk!

I don't know what it is with people on this small island lately, but it seems that their philanthropic spirits are popping up big time!

My colleague DC who donated to Clippers' Shear Inspiration event has himself decided to raise some money for the CCF's 'Hair for Hope' event in July this year.

Why shave? The CCF's website says that "Children with cancer going through chemotherapy lose their hair due to the side effect of the treatment. Hence, it symbolises their fight against cancer. With every head shaven, we hope to foster greater understanding and awareness, as well as to celebrate the courage of these children. At the same time, funds raised from the events are channelled to improve the quality of life our children and their families."

DC is doing this to help children who are living with cancer. They do not have a choice so if you only donate to one charity this year, please consider this worthy one. Even if you don't live on this small island, the CCF accepts online pledges.

Thanks so much!

It’s Official!

2007-05-23T10:51:00.000+08:00

Although I’ve been wearing the bling for the last six weeks, P and I didn’t have our official engagement dinner until last Saturday. We invited Rachel and family, including my cousin and her hubby who were visiting from Sheepland. We ate at my favourite Chinese restaurant and then met some friends for drinks afterwards.

I got all dolled up with a trial wedding make up run, put my hair in a twist and wore a lovely black lace and pink dress. I was aiming for the vintage 1950’s look and P said I looked like a “Chinese Barbie”! That is a compliment…I think! He prefers me without make up but well, which woman (even if she is a natural beauty and modest too hee hee) doesn’t like to play dress up now and then?!

We ended up dancing at one of the hippest clubs on our small island and ran into soooo many people. Although we were quite drunk and tired, we were all having so much fun that everyone was reluctant to go home! Both Rachel and my HK friend looked great and were popular with the boys but that didn’t surprise me at all.

We also met a guy I used to go diving with. I always thought he was nice and in a happy marriage, but he had a bit too much to drink and forgot how to behave himself! I was gobsmacked when I found out later that he had run his drink along the top of Rachel’s tube top! She was not impressed but as usual, was too polite to tell him off. He also tried his luck with my HK friend but she wouldn’t give him the time of day. His wife was out of town, otherwise I’m sure he wouldn’t have dared behave in such an abysmal manner. I won’t tell her as we are not close, but poor woman, that is just not on. Being drunk is not a good enough excuse. Believe me when I say that there is never a dull moment in this town!

P will be here for another two weeks and we were originally going diving next weekend. However, the silly resort owner cancelled our room by mistake and so we will just chill out here now. We are going to the water park on Friday, cycling on Sunday and then have lined up a massage for next weekend. Can’t wait!

Save the Date!

2007-05-18T11:00:00.001+08:00

Shear Inspiration – Amazing Women

2007-05-16T17:11:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, I received an email from Clippers, an expatriate woman I know, with the subject: Shear Inspiration.

It is an initiative aimed at raising funds and awareness for the Children's Cancer Foundation. A group of 20 women are shaving their heads this Saturday to raise S$250,000 to fund one of the two bone marrow transplant rooms that the CCF wants to install at the women and children’s hospital here on our small island.

There are currently 18 children with a bone marrow match waiting for the rooms to become available so that they can have their transplant. When a child has a bone marrow transplant, they are confined to their sterile room for six weeks. With a total of only five sterile rooms on our whole island, combined with the time it takes for the treatment, there is a waitlist. Hence, the need for a wonderful initiative like this.

I would have loved to participate as well and had thought about doing something like this last year. I only found out about the event this week and they already have their 20 women. Plus, with the wedding coming up in November, do I really want to have matching haircuts with the groom?!!

As I am completely inspired (their objective) by what they are doing, I decided that the next best thing would be to try and raise some additional funds for Clippers. So my colleagues and favourite aunt have combined to cough up almost S$1,000 in support of her head shaving exercise this weekend. Not too bad indeed! In addition, some of the people on our bike hash (unbeknownst to me, Clipper’s husband is also a member!) will also be donating so that is wonderful news all round!

Unfortunately, I will not be able to go as P will be in town and we have a family dinner which has been planned for weeks. However, I look forward to seeing the photos and to hearing all about the event and will definitely update you guys.

For those of you who are interested in reading more about Shear Inspiration, please visit their website.

Updated on 18 May 2007: The total collected from my colleagues is S$1,242! So with my aunt's and the bike hash members' contributions, we are looking at over S$1,500! Yahooooooooooooo!

You Know You are Aging…

2007-05-07T15:43:00.000+08:00

When you go to the doctor to get some medication for your cough, and she ends up recommending cosmetic procedures for your face!

This morning, I went to the doctor as I wasn’t feeling well. I noticed some photos on her wall of a girl who had bad acne in the ‘before’ photo and very clear skin in the ‘after’ photo. To be fair, the doctor only started pointing out all my flaws when I asked her about the other girl who had done a chemical peel.

The doctor suggested that I remove my moles by laser, which would be carried out by a plastic surgeon. She also said that I could do with eight shots of Botox on the wrinkles around each eye and a filler to give my nose a bridge. The grand total of these procedures is over US$1,300. The Botox will last for six months, while the bridge filler can either be temporary or permanent, depending on which substance she injects.

She did give me some food for thought and I am considering it because of the upcoming wedding. When I told P about what she said, he wasn’t too pleased as he thinks I’m perfect as I am. But he is completely biased and I am well aware that fine lines have developed around my eyes over the last few years. Although they don’t normally bother me, it doesn’t hurt to look one’s best.

I’ve always been pretty experimental with my body (my 12.5 inch dragon tattoo on my right hip) so what’s a little Botox? I’m just concerned that I’ll end up looking like those Hollywood actresses who overdo it or wacko Jacko!!

Anyway, I’m not going to rush into anything and will take a few months to do some research and to consider if I should proceed or not. Watch this face, I mean space!

Moving Swiftly Along or Not as the Case May Be

2007-05-03T12:56:00.000+08:00

We have finally sent off the deposit cheque to confirm the wedding venue by the river, so there’s no turning back now! I am very relieved and look forward to spending a great evening with my family and friends. Here are a few photos of the venue in case you guys want a sneak peek:

Originally, we wanted to have a sit down dinner with only 40 guests. But we quickly realized that there are too many important people in our lives, so we are now having a more casual buffet for about 60. With the wedding only six months away, things are slowly coming together (fingers crossed!). We will be finalizing the guest list next month and sending the invites out in September.

I’ve been organizing the wedding with Rachel’s help as P has been busy interviewing. It has been a very stressful time for him, but he’s managing well in spite of the slowness of the recruitment process there. For example, he saw one recruiter four weeks ago, and it’s only today that he’s interviewing at a company through them! It is no surprise that Aussies have the reputation of being laid back and cruisy with “No worries, mate!” being their national motto.

I don't know how I would cope if I ever have to move there as I'm a very efficient person. I'm sure it will cause me a lot of frustration as I can't stand laziness and dillying and dallying around.

P will be here in two weeks and I can’t wait to see him! I’ve turned into one of those women Rachel calls “smug married” and I miss him like crazy. My friend DJ was reminding me the other day, “Remember when you told me you were so happy being single about a week before you met P?” How could I forget? I guess the universe just wanted me to eat my words…

As they say, never say never!

I've got an Old Man's Disease!

2007-04-20T13:10:00.000+08:00

Just when you think life couldn't get any more comic, it does.

Yesterday morning, I woke up at about 4am with a feeling akin to a cramp in my left foot. Not thinking much about it, I went back to bed. When I got up for work a few hours later, the pain was still there, though I decided to go into the office anyway. I spent the day in my Birkenstocks limping around (looking quite silly as the rest of me was dressed corporate) and ignored my colleagues' advice to go to the doctor. I figured that I must just have pulled a muscle while I was sleeping and thought it would be better the next day.

How wrong I was! When I woke up this morning, I could hardly walk at all. In fact, my foot was so swollen and painful that I couldn't put any weight on it and I knew then that something was seriously wrong. I hopped into the bathroom to get ready and Rachel then helped me hop to the waiting taxi, who whisked me off to my company doctor's emergency clinic.

When I got there, the doctor prodded my foot and then told me that I had gout! I was so shocked as I've always thought that only older men had it, but apparently not. He gave me two injections to help ease the pain and sent me home with more tablets and instructions to rest. I've just woken up from a nap and am still in shock.

Part of it is genetic, as I found out that my uncle also suffers from gout. But the other part is dietary, and I realize that I will have to make a major lifestyle change. There are certain foods that trigger the condition and that includes things like liver (my favourite!), anchovies, and alcohol (oh no!!)! I can no longer boast that I keep slim and gorgeous on a diet of fried chicken wings and vodka cranberries. As both Rachel and B-Dawg gleefully pointed out to me, all that partying has come back and bitten me in the a88! Or should I say, the foot.

Attacks normally last between 3 - 10 days and are controllable, though they definitely can recur. I hope that this is a one off and that I'll be better soon. I really do not want to hobble down the aisle on crutches and instead of playing the wedding march, it'll have to be the wedding hop! Argh!

Saved by the Belles

2007-04-19T10:15:00.001+08:00

Although it has been one obstacle after another in regards to the organization of the wedding over the past week, there is finally some light at the end of the tunnel.

Last night, a girlfriend of mine, Li, agreed to step in as the MC so thankfully, I have not be left in the lurch.

Rachel and I have also looked at a few more venues, and we are hoping to confirm one by early next week. The place I like the most is an open concept bar located down by the river and is gorgeous during the evening. It is surrounded by a lot of greenery and soft lighting makes it very romantic at night. Keep your fingers crossed that this is “The One”! Both Rachel and I are getting quite jaded and time is marching on whilst I’m still floundering around without a venue where I can marry the man I love!

On a positive note, my wedding dress arrived from the US two days ago. It’s a lovely off-white Nicole Miller silk number that Rachel said would look good on me and encouraged me to buy. I love it as it’s an absolutely perfect fit and only needs the length taken up. The dress brings out all my hidden curves as well. What makes it even better is that I got it at ¼ of its retail price on ebay! I am truly a bargain hunter extraordinaire, even if I do say so myself. After the wedding, I’ll be able to shorten it and wear it as a cocktail dress as it’s truly a classic piece.

Anyway, it would be fair to say that I’ll be glad when this whole wedding palava is over and I can concentrate on enjoying married life with P!

As the Wedding World Turns…

2007-04-17T14:18:00.000+08:00

These are the nightmarish days of a bride-to-be’s life.

The soap opera that is now my life rolls on relentlessly. Not only am I in the midst of looking for an alternative wedding venue, but I also had a major falling out with my MC this past weekend and may have to get a new one if he doesn’t apologize to me soon!

The seed that started our argument was planted a few months back, when my ex-husband Mark visited our small island and came out partying with a group of about 12 – 15 of my friends one night. My MC invited an Australian colleague of his, Sheila, and when she arrived, all of our eyes just about popped out.

Although a very attractive woman in her early 30s, she definitely suffered from a case of “trying too hard”. She wore a very skimpy halter-neck top that covered so little of her assets that you could actually see that they were asymmetrical. Folks, I kid you not, the left one was bigger than the right by quite a bit!

Me being the gossip that I am, I immediately texted my friend Ken across the table. He read my message, looked at her chest and just laughed out loud. A bit rude I admit, but then I’ve never pretended to be otherwise. My friends, P and I were all having a good laugh at Sheila’s expense but then it just got funnier.

Now Mark is not a bad looking man. More like a big brother to me these days, but I can see how other women might find him attractive. Anyway, Sheila was using her big guns to maximum advantage, and each time she talked to him, she would lean across the table and squeeze her assets together. It was so obvious that Mark even told me he had to tell himself, “Look at her face! LOOK AT HER FACE!”

So it was no surprise to anyone that they ended up bleeping that night, although my MC kept denying that they had gone home together. However, other sources told me otherwise.

I found the whole incident hilarious and would still joke about it now and then. The way I see it is this: if Sheila didn’t want people gossiping about her, then she wouldn’t have slept with someone’s ex-husband on the first night of meeting this group of people through a work contact. Although I’ve been a naughty girl in my past, this is something I certainly would not do. I’ve learnt the hard way that you do not mix business with pleasure as it always comes back and bites you in the hiney.

My MC became very protective of Sheila and didn’t like me talking about this incident. I later found out that it was because she already had a boyfriend at the time she hooked up with Mark, and my MC didn’t want her boyfriend finding out about her infidelity. Boy oh boy, the tangled webs we weave…

Of course, that didn’t stop me from talking about it some more ha ha. When I met up with another friend Chilli Padi at my MC’s birthday party this past Saturday night, we laughed about it because Sheila was also there. At some point during the evening, my MC told me that he didn’t want me mention it anymore because I had to respect the fact that Sheila didn’t want anything to ruin her relationship with her boyfriend!

Now all of you who know me well (and most of you do) also know that I do not take kindly to anyone telling me what to do. The only person who can get away with that is the person who pays my salary every month. Even P and my dad don’t tell me what to do as they are not stupid. If you try, it will be the first and last time. I am definitely open to a calm one-on-one chat session, but giving me instructions? I don’t think so.

Anyway, we are at the point where my MC wants to impose his views on me and I refuse to accept them. Sheila and I actually had a very decent conversation on the night of his birthday and we didn’t talk about Mark once. I would never do anything to break up anyone’s professional or personal relationship, but that doesn’t mean I am not going to joke about them behind their backs. There is no malice intended and to me, it was all done in fun.

My MC still doesn’t get that it’s not the fact that Sheila and Mark hooked up that bothers me, but that just because he says so, I am “not allowed” to talk about it anymore. He has to learn that he cannot control his friends’ behaviour and opinions and we are currently taking a time out from the friendship.

This puts me in a very difficult position. I would like to have my MC at the wedding as we have been friends for over nine years, but he also has to realize that he has crossed my accepted boundaries. Although I am now more easy going than I was a few years ago, there are still certain behaviours that I will not tolerate. If he does not apologize, then I will have to find another MC to host the wedding.

One diva (me) at the wedding will be quite enough and I am exploring the option of getting a professional to do the job so that I don’t have to deal with yet another drama. Anybody know anyone?

Love and Restaurants: Mutually Exclusive?

2007-04-12T21:11:00.002+08:00

I have a theory about restaurants and occasions related to love like Valentine's Day and weddings. The people who run eating establishments must think that those who are in love have mush not just in their hearts, but in their brains too. How else can you explain the sky high prices they charge people for celebrations held at their venues?

Jaded? It is still seven months to the wedding and I've already run the idea of elopement past P. If it wasn't for the fact that I loved my family and friends so much, I would have said, "Let's get the first flight to Vegas!"

We started looking for wedding venues back in December and thought we'd found the perfect place: a refurbished icon that used to be a government building right by the river. However, after several discussions and "unexpected" additional costs later, we decided together with Rachel (our wedding planner) that for the amount of money we were willing to shell out, the requisite customer service was just not there. The people who ran the building considered themselves venue providers and no more, so everything else had to be done on our own with no support from them whatsoever.

On to the next location. What looked at first glance like a perfect setting for our nuptuals has now caused us quite a lot of frustration. It is a tiny french restaurant set in an old colonial building, with a pre-war wall and delicious food that we could treat our loved ones too. Initially, we were looking to have an intimate party for no more than 45 people. However, some of P's family and my dad's friends have asked if they can celebrate with us. Although it causes some logistical issues, I am actually VERY flattered that they want to share our special day and I am more than happy to say yes.

So, from a five-course dinner, we asked the restaurant owner to come up with a buffet menu. As far as I'm aware, buffets are normally cheaper than sit down dinners as there is less serving staff required. However, today he told us that we will have to pay an additional minimum of US$380 for equipment rental! This is on top of over US$5,000 we would have already spent on food and beverages for less than 50 people. He said that he would have to rent chafing dishes, a bain marie, cocktail tables and so on. Is it me or aren't restaurants supposed to supply things like that?! And if they don't have them, it is certainly a long-term investment they should make and spread the cost out over time and several bookings. For that amount of money, heck, I want to KEEP the cocktail tables!

One thing I do know is that we will not be held ransom to any venue. Our island may be small but we always have choices. And I will come back to the essential truth, which is that it is the marriage that is important to us and not the wedding event itself. I know that P and I will have a great party no matter where we are, as long as our family and friends are with us.

So wish us the best as Rachel and I continue our search for the right venue. I know we will find it, even if it takes some time. Now I know why people start planning their wedding a year in advance. What should be a simple exercise is actually a minefield of wrong turns and unexpected surprises (and I don't mean babies). We know a couple in Hong Kong getting married this time next year. Mr Scotland and Ms Fur, don't say you haven't been warned!

Baby, Baby, Baby!

2007-04-09T16:01:00.000+08:00

Got you all there, didn't I? I hate to disappoint but it's not me that is having a baby! As far as I know, hell hasn't frozen over yet.

However, I would like to say congratulations to my friends in Switzerland on the birth of their baby boy. Isn't he a munchkin? He was born last week and here he is having his first bath at home:

It makes me laugh to hear both his parents say how adorable, sqeezable and wonderful he is because they both used to really dislike kids ha ha. Now they are head over heels in love with the baby and I'm very happy for them!

I really wish you guys a long and wonderful life with your little man and many more to join him perhaps?!

Life as an Engaged Woman

2007-04-04T19:50:00.000+08:00

Okay, I promise that this will be the last blog entry (at least for now) about my engagement ring. I got my nails done yesterday and couldn't resist taking another photo so now you all can see it in perspective with my entire hand. Nice huh, and the ring ain't bad either ha ha.

Huney saw the ring earlier this week when we met to talk about the wedding invitations she is doing for us (more about that later). She said that the ring was perfect for me because like me, the stone is full of hard edges or something along those lines. There was a compliment in there somewhere I think, or maybe not!

I also told P that the ring truly symbolizes our relationship: It is flawed (as in the stone is not a perfect diamond, though it is to me), however, it is an object of true beauty and we both still love it and would not want to be without it. Oh my god, did I just write that? Where has the real Jan gone? Have I been abducted by aliens who've left a Stepford Sgbabe behind? Someone, pass me a bucket...

We have asked our friends to help us with the wedding preparations and I'm very happy to say that they are all so willing to get involved. I've realized that the wedding is not just about P and me, but about family as well.

Huney has come up with a couple of very good ideas for the invites and we love what she's done so far. Rachel is my witness and main event planner. And my dad's partner Lila is the stylist. She and her sister are in charge of making me look gorgeous on the day. Now, no snide remarks about that being an impossible task please!

I've seen some dresses on ebay (where else) that I like and should get my lazy b*tt down to a few bridal shops to check out more designs. Although I love clothes, I've never been the 'fantasy wedding' type. I don't need a fancy dress or expensive make up to have a great time. All I need is P, and to have our loved ones eating good food, drinking champagne and partying it up! I am aiming for simple elegance, and I know that Lila will help me achieve that.

This being the second time around, we just want to celebrate our joy. I know that I speak for both of us when I say that we are very happy to have found love at a time when neither of us were ever expecting to get married again. We were both leading very similar lives before we met: dating unsuitable youngsters, partying a lot and not caring about anyone besides ourselves. Our story should give all single people hope because if we can find love at the Four Floors, anyone can find love anywhere! It will happen when you're not expecting it, and when you're truly happy with what you have in life.

P's best man, who is flying in from Brrringland for the wedding, is apparently a Tyson Beckford lookalike (I can't verify this as I've never seen a photo of him). I hope that the women don't end up drooling at him instead of at my dress ha ha.

We'll have wedding guests coming from overseas and believe it or not, this includes my ex-husband Mark. He gets on very well with P and my friends, and I consider Mark a trusted friend too. Yes, it is unusual and some people will probably find it strange but hey, this is me, and when have I ever done things the 'normal' way?! Mark and I have worked hard at becoming friends after our marriage ended ten years ago and I am very proud of how far we've both come.

Anyway, I will keep you guys in the loop and you'll definitely be hearing much more about the wedding in the upcoming months! I know I know, groan....

Musings about Marriage

2007-03-31T20:13:00.000+08:00

After the initial excitement of receiving my engagement ring, I've had a couple of days to calm down and to enjoy looking at it in all its blingy glory! I've also had time to think a bit about what the ring represents to us as a couple and what getting married to P means to me.

While I try not to wash any of our dirty laundry on the blog, common sense tells you that P and I have had our ups and downs over the last six months. Because of my own family history and insecurities, I have had difficulty accepting that P has a child who will always own a part of his heart. When I get angry at him for whatever reason (and most of you are aware of my infamous temper!), I say horrible things about her with no holds barred. He handles it by not reacting in anger, which would exacerbate the situation, but with infinite patience and kindness.

I even spoke to his parents about my feelings when I was in Melbourne and to my surprise, they were very understanding. I thought it would be best to be honest and for them to know what I was like, warts and all. I would prefer if they disliked the real me, rather then like the false front which I could have presented to them.

I know that this is something I eventually have to accept. At the moment, it is manageable because we do not have any contact with her. However, there is a distinct possibility that she will try to find P once she is older and out from under her evil mother's influence. Hopefully by then, I would have mellowed out (who was it who said that wishing is for free?!!), matured (ha!) and be much better equipped to handle this.

And while I love P very much, he does come with his own set of traits honed by living the first 37 years of his life without any 'guidance' from me. He has an extremely annoying habit of putting off to tomorrow what he could do today. I'm not sure if this is a trait exclusive to him, although I did notice that his family are also procrastinators. Maybe it's genetic?!

I am completely the opposite, being extremely organized and on the ball 99% of the time. I know that I'm the fire under P's a** and sometimes, I have to turn the heat up and shout at him to get something done. I don't enjoy this aspect of his personality (although he insists that I like telling him what to do!) but I've accepted that although it may take him some time, he eventually gets there in the end (with a little help from me of course :-D).

It would be so much easier if P came "made to measure" and behaved in the exact way I desired, but then, what would I have to moan about on the blog?!!

As this is the second marriage for both of us, I do believe we have a better grasp of how to continually work on a healthy relationship that will go the distance. We are both fiery and have our ding dongs (some of them quite loud) but once we calm down, we always discuss things and come to agreements or compromises in the end. I think the core of it is that we are both fully committed to the relationship and really enjoy spending time with each other. Perhaps all of you who have had long and happy relationships can give us a few pointers?!!

Ultimately, I am really looking forward to being married. Although I am very independent and was happy being single, P has brought a different dimension into my life. Even my dad has commented that I've calmed down somewhat since I met P, who is always there to remind me not to be so selfish. I also know that one of my life lessons is to deal with my jealousy of his child as this ties in with my own turbulent childhood and upbringing. He has been extremely supportive and wants only the best for me, and that is a huge comfort. I know that I've already started developing more as a person since I met him, and there will be more growth to come.

Some of you have already commented on how I've progressed since I started writing this blog, from the first entry about seeing keys on someone's Prince Albert piercing in a bar, to eventually getting engaged!

So all in all, I am VERY appreciative of all that I have and here's looking to the future while definitely enjoying the present!

I've got my Engagement Bling!

2007-03-29T20:12:00.001+08:00

Oops, I mean ring! After talking about getting married for ages, P finally got round to buying my ring and we are officially engaged as of today!! We chose a gorgeous 2.34 carat asscher cut centre stone flanked by two trapezoid diamonds and smaller baguette cut diamonds on the shank. Here it looks very sparkly because of the flash:

And here it is in natural evening light:

And another shot of it from the side:

I love it as it's gorgeous and unusual. Oh, and I'm of course very excited about getting married too ha ha.

We have looked at what feels like hundred of rings, and I want to say a very BIG thank you to all of my friends on the 'engagement ring committee' who have endured months of me sending them link after link (groan) after link of various designs, cuts, sizes, etc. I know all of them were getting to the point where they were dreading my emails and Huney even said that all the rings were starting to look the same! So to my wonderful friends, thanks for being there for me always and for indulging all my whims.

P and I plan on getting married later on this year with just a small celebration of very close friends and family. We have lots to do in the mean time so I'll leave it here for now and get cracking!

Eek, I'm in my late 30's!

2007-03-25T17:28:00.000+08:00

The inevitable has happened, I celebrated my 37th birthday yesterday and now (unwillingly) join the ranks of those in their 'late 30's'!! I know this is the lament only of the older generation but where has time gone?!! It still feels like yesterday when I graduated from university but I realize now that it has been 16 years. Oh my god! If I wasn't nursing a bad hangover, I would have a drink right now to deal with the shock.

My friends kindly organized a dinner to help me through this 'difficult time' and we ate at a lovely Italian restaurant. My dad joined us and it was a great evening. As there were so many yummy looking dishes on the menu, my dad agreed to order the squid ink pasta with cod fish and he shared a bit of it with me. Everyone ended up laughing at us because our teeth, tongue and lips were entirely coated in black ink ha ha. But it was worth it as the pasta was perfectly al dente and the sauce full of flavour!

Afterwards, we went for a few drinks and dancing although my dad didn't join us as he was going cycling at 7 this morning. I had a wonderful time with my friends, although I did miss P's presence. But he will be coming to Singapore in mid-May for two weeks and we'll be going diving then. So lots of good things to look forward to.

Have a great week everyone!

All About the Family

2007-03-12T06:22:00.000+08:00

I'm finally back home after 10 glorious days in Oz. Do I want to be here? As I had to leave P behind, the answer is a resounding NO. But life goes on and the real world ie work beckons. It will be odd not having him come meet me for lunch or pick me up after work every evening as he did for the last five months. But the blissful time where P was still on holiday couldn't last forever.

He will do casual work while he looks for a permanent job somewhere in the vast land Down Under. On one hand, we are impatient for the next phase of our life together to begin, but on the other hand, this is a very exciting time. Not just for us, but also for P's family.

Two years ago, they upped sticks and left Brrrrrrr-ingland in search of a more suitable lifestyle for the kids. The education in Oz is so much better and the great outdoors is amazing. They ended up in Melbourne where his mum and sister work as nurses. It has taken them some time to adapt to a new country, but they love their life in Oz.

P is now with them and it's been really good for the whole family to spend quality time together. His nieces Little Darling (LD) and Medium Darling (MD) absolutely adore him.

As I flew in very late when I first arrived, I didn't get a chance to meet the girls as they were already in bed. The following morning at around 7.30am, we heard a little tap, tap, tap on the bedroom door. P said, "Come in!" and LD came into the room, stood next to the bed and just looked at me with her big blue eyes and a sweet little smile on her lips. I was still half asleep and definitely bleary-eyed but she just couldn't wait to meet me!

I met MD after I got out of bed and she is also a lovely girl, very good at sports and a bit of a dreamer.

It was necessary to distinguish all the 'darlings' in the house because it got a bit confusing. I call P darling as well and one day I said to him, "Darling, come here," and before he could respond, LD was in front of me with her arms held up to be carried and said, "I'm here!".

I love P's entire family and really enjoyed watching him with them. For the last few months, P has been hanging out with me, my family and friends in my country. This trip was a chance for me to see him in another context and I definitely liked what I saw. His family are great and I really felt at home with them. His parents and sister are very down to earth, with wicked senses of humour and no airs and graces at all.

I will see them in later on the year when I go over to visit again. For now, it's back to the grindstone and dreams of bright sunshine, the lovely ocean and Kangaroo steaks...

The Great Ocean Road

2007-03-08T14:41:00.000+08:00

We are finally back in Melbourne after three days on the Great Ocean Road. I found a gorgeous B&B at the Aireys Inlet where the Split Point Lighthouse is. Words cannot describe how beautiful the view was from our bedroom, so I will let the following photographs speak for themselves.

Aireys by the Light is a three-bedroom B&B run by Elizabeth and Peter, a lovely couple who made us feel so welcomed. We sat on the balcony in the evenings watching the waves crash on the beach, wind blowing in our hair. Absolutely amazing. At night, we'd read in bed with the balcony door open listening to the sea.

We went for a walk along the cliff and turning back, we could see the lighthouse in the distance.

Yesterday, we drove two hours to see the 12 Apostles, another amazing sight.

I have always loved Australia and this trip was no different. P and I spent some serious quality time together, talking about things we've done in our past (and how we would've done them differently in hindsight) and the future life we would like to have together.

I only have a few days left here before I go back to my own small island so I'll be making the best of the time. P will visit me in a couple of months and I'll be back here later on in the year.

Tomorrow, my friend the Consultant will be coming for dinner with her partner. I'll be cooking Chinese food for the guests and P's family! Me cooking, that is another rare occurance ha ha. It's amazing what love does to a person...

I'm Here in the Land..

2007-03-06T05:29:00.000+08:00

Down Under!

For my birthday this month, P bought me a flight ticket to Melbourne so here I am visiting his family. His parents, sister and two nieces are all very nice and for someone who is not that crazy about kids, the two littles ones (aged 4 and 8) have been particularly lovely to me. I've got lots of hugs and countless kisses ha ha. Who would have thought eh?!

We are halfway through a one-week holiday and have been to the beach, sat at numerous cafes and met up with my friend the Consultant and seen her beautiful house in East Brighton. Later today, we are off to a gorgeous B&B at the Lighthouse along the Great Ocean Road. Photos will follow after the trip.

I fly back to the small island on Sunday but P will stay on and look for work here. More updates to come so watch this space!

Cancer is All Around Us

2007-02-16T10:25:00.000+08:00

After losing my aunt to lung cancer in May 2006, I thought that the disease would give my family a respite. Unfortunately in the last couple of months, two more of my aunts (my dad’s sister-in-law and his youngest sister) have been struck and are battling stage 4 cancers. I am not particularly close to them, but from what little I’ve seen, they have been pretty stoic and brave in the face of this challenge. No matter which way you look at it though, the disease does affect the entire family and in particular, I worry about my dad.

He is very close to both women and loves them deeply. Although we have not talked that much about it, I can see that he has become rather subdue of late, which is totally understandable. As a daughter, I am trying my best to support him, although what can one really do under the current circumstances? Life is sometimes terribly unfair. Right now I will just spend as much time with him as possible and to keep him busy.

What has also upset me recently is the behaviour of my mum and sister towards him. It’s a long story which I won’t get into but in essence, they are unhappy because I’ve invited my dad’s partner to a party later on in the year. They also received an invitation from me, but chose to ignore it. It’s no secret that my parents had a terrible divorce and my dad has admitted he could have handled the split better.

It took me a long time to forgive him and to accept his partner. I too, blamed her for years and she and I have talked about this recently. I know that we all make choices in our youth, which we realize are foolish only when we reach our 30s and 40s. I’m really glad that I addressed the issue because I don’t want to live a life full of bitterness and anger. There is no point holding on to the past and there comes a point where you have to decide to move on. You can choose the path you walk and I'm glad I reconciled with my dad and his partner because they have really added so much to my life.

Right now, I would please ask that all of you pray for my family because I don’t know what else can be done. I honestly do not think we need any more reminders that life is short. We already know this!

Looking Back and Moving Forward

2006-12-22T16:18:00.000+08:00

I can't believe that it will be Christmas in just two days. People always say that time flies, but it really has this year!

2006 has been pretty eventful and in a way, I'm relieved that it is almost time for a fresh start. However, though there have been difficult experiences over the months, I've also had some of the most amazing times of my life.

On the down side, I lost my good friend Lane in April and my aunt in May to cancer. I still think about them everyday and I don't think that will ever change. But it's because of what happened to them that I realize life IS short and try to appreciate more of the good things that I DO have.

Around the same time, I left a job that I loved at a non-profit organization to join an investment bank. This was so that I could earn more money to finance the gorgeous apartment I bought last year. The stress I've had to go through hasn't always been easy, but I knew it was the trade off I had to make.

I miss my old boss a lot and she will always have my utmost respect, but I've also learnt so much on the new job. I entered an industry in which I had basically no knowledge. In just eight months, I've found out much more about the stock market and also started an investment fund for my retirement. I have met some great people here and it's always a bonus when you like colleagues enough to make them your friends. I think this job will challenge me for a while to come and that is a good thing as I never want to stop learning.

On a positive note, my relationships with my dad and his girlfriend (whom I jokingly refer to as 'my stepmum') have improved tremendously. It is an ongoing process of getting to know each other. My dad has mellowed over the years and does his best. But sometimes, he still rubs me up the wrong way! People say it's because we are so similar and I guess they are right. We are both stubborn, outspoken and on occasion, grumpy b*ggers! But, I love him anyway and he's always good for a laugh. How many people can boast about hanging out with their dad at a biker bar?! Not that many I would imagine!

I also spent most of 2006 without a 'significant other' and I can say with all honesty that I really enjoyed being single. But don't misunderstand me. P is the mirror of who I am and I wouldn't trade him for anyone else. However, getting comfortable with myself was one of the greatest things I did for me this year. I know that P respects me more because I can take care of myself and am with him not out of need, but out of love.

It has not been all roses for us though. Aside from the uncertainty and stress stemming from his job search, we are both fiercely independent people who had pretty much accepted that we would be single for the rest of our lives. It is taking us time to get used to the 'change of status' and all the issues that being in a relationship brings. We didn't date like most other couples and within a 24-hour period, went from 'single and carefree' to 'living together'. Not the most ideal situation, but that is just the way it happened.

For all of you who are still looking for someone not just to love, but to really be IN love with, I believe that the key is to be happy with yourself first. It has taken me almost 37 years to find P, and it came at a juncture in my life where I was finally comfortable with being on my own. At my dad's birthday dinner earlier this week, he told P and me, "When you are in a relationship with the wrong person, it diminishes who you are. But when you are with the right person, it makes you the best person that you can be." This is the relationship that I've always wanted but never had. P is my "Best Friend Plus" and I am thankful for all the wonderful things that he has brought into my life.

Like my respected friend Gim (Gorgeous Italian Man) once told me, life is made up of positive and negative experiences and you don't have one without the other. I am lucky to have a very tight circle of friends, both on our small island and overseas. But I've also had to cut two women out of my life this year. It wasn't decisions that I took lightly as I did care for them a lot. But I know that it was the right thing to do as they were just sucking my energy dry. I've come to the conclusion that it is very difficult to be friends with insecure women, as they are constantly needing reassurance that they are not fat, old, ugly (fill in the blank), etc. BORING! Because they are so unsure of themselves, they also then do things that are detrimental to the friendship. That is just not something I am interested in being around. My time is precious and I don't want to waste it hanging out with people that I cannot learn from.

As 2007 approaches, I want to take stock of all the things that I am thankful for and to focus on what I would like to achieve next year. For the former, it is pretty easy i.e. my family, friends, good health, a wonderful man who loves and accepts me as I am and the opportunity to develop my skills at work.

In terms of the latter, I want to continue to evolve as a person and to always remain centered, regardless of what is going on around me. To do this, I need to meditate more and to party less (so much easier said than done!). I want to continue to show my loved ones how much I appreciate them and on a larger scale, give as much as I can afford to charity.

I have quite a few parties over the Christmas and New Year period and I look forward to spending time with those that I love. I also want to thank all of you who have supported me through the tough times this year, especially my dad and 'stepmum', my flatmate Rachel and my friends living in Bali, Copenhagen, London, Memphis, Nottingham and Zurich.

Let the good times roll!

Men Behaving Madly!

2006-12-01T10:48:00.000+08:00

I bet many of you thought that my life would become a lot tamer now that I've met P and settled down. I wish I could say that this was true, but B and P have added their own twists to our group of friends and given us plenty of excitement over the last month and a half!

I will start with B, who is Paul's travelling companion on their 'aborted' round-the-world trip. Five weeks after meeting Sexy Scooter (they hooked up the same night that I met P), B proposed to her and they are now engaged! No, don't rub your eyes, it isn't a typo. I swear, hand on heart, that this is true. When all of us first found out, we were in complete and utter shock. I know that B and P's friends from back home were equally skeptical and thought this was a wind up. Well, apparently it isn't a joke and they are seriously going through with this. It may seem like insanity to the rest of us, but I still wish them the best of luck and much happiness for the future.

We also celebrated P's 37th birthday earlier this week with a close bunch of friends. The party ended up at a motorcycle bar, where the owner (who also did our tattoos) treated P to a drink called Loopy Juice (the recipe is a secret). Essentially, it is a tower of glasses with very potent alcohol at the bottom. The bartender sets another glass of alcohol on fire and pours it down the glasses, in essence, creating a towering inferno. See the accompanying photo which I took with my phone camera.

Having drunk a litre or two of vodka cranberry earlier in the night, P lost his sense of judgment and decided that sucking down the Loopy Juice was the best way to go, so that is exactly what he did. He downed it in about three seconds flat. Well, things quickly went pear-shaped after that, starting with the taxi ride home.

My flatmate Rachel, her colleague Dina, P and I shared a cab home. As we were on her way, Dina was going to drop us off and then head on further. I only realized how drunk P was when we reached our condo and he refused to get out of the taxi. Rachel had already given Dina $10 to pay for the fare, but P insisted that the taxi driver take money from him even though he refused to accept it. I told P several times to get out of the taxi but he didn't pay me any attention until I shouted, "Get out of the taxi now or else I'm going to slap you!". The taxi driver just started laughing but P finally got out.

We started to walk back towards the apartment (or so I thought) when I suddenly realized that I was on my own. I turned around and saw P hugging the life out of poor Rachel, all the while saying, "Thank you so much for letting me stay, thank you for all your support, I love you!" The ramblings of a drunken man, which I thought were pretty sweet.

We got into the apartment and P somehow managed to take his shirt off and even put it in the laundry basket. He walked into the bedroom, turned on the light, unbuckled his belt and got his jeans to his knees before collapsing on our bed face up. Luckily, his underpants were still on. He had his eyes shut and looked like he had passed out. I called Rachel to come over and have a look (a bit mean on my part I admit) and we stood at the doorway and had a quiet laugh at his expense.

With his eyes still closed, P suddenly started calling, "Raaaaaacheeeeeeel, Raaaaacheeeeeeel, come here!!!". Laughing, she went into the room and he held his arms up and said, "Give me a hug!!", which she did. Then he said again, "I love you! I love you!". My only regret of the night is forgetting to take a photo as I was too busy trying not to p*ss myself!

After this, Rachel wisely went to bed and I was tidying up when P suddenly came to and said to me, "Baybeeeeeeeeeeeee, there is something heavy on my knees!". The jeans and his belt were still around his knees and restricting his movements! I finally managed to get him sorted out and he passed out for real this time.

Rachel and I had another good laugh in the kitchen the next morning while P was still sleeping off his hangover. I told P what happened the next day and he cannot remember any of it. He was absolutely mortified when I told him what he had done and quickly sent an apologetic text to Rachel. In fact, he has spent the subsequent days trying to avoid running into her ha ha ha.

Let this be a lesson to all of you out there. Even when you think you're too old to misbehave, believe me, when alcohol is involved, nothing is impossible!

Don't Call Me Mum!

2006-11-07T07:36:00.000+08:00

I know that I've been a bit slack with updating the blog lately. It's not that I haven't had anything going on. In fact, it's been the opposite. In the last two weeks, I've celebrated Rachel's birthday, dressed up as a sailor for Halloween and been to the US Marine Corps ball.

In addition, the Dive Master P who featured in my last blog entry has decided to stay and look for a job on our small island. It has been great having him around and we've had a lot of fun together. This time last month, the last thing I was looking for was a relationship, but as time has gone on, it seems to have developed into that. I'm not complaining of course, P is a fantastic guy who treats me with respect and showers me with attention. We have literally been joined at the hip over the last four weeks and he has been a great support to me through a difficult time at work. He also gets along really well with my friends and I've been having the time of my life. But you don't get to your mid-30s, date a man your own age and expect him not to have any baggage.

As most of you know, I have never wanted to have children of my own. Blame this on my parents' lousy marriage, my desire for independence or whatever else you may like. It has even been an area of contention in my serious relationships. So in my mind, I thought that dating someone who already had kids and who didn't want any more would be the answer to the problem. I can already hear the laughter coming from over all over the world. Yes, certainly very naive on my part.

P was very honest from the beginning and told me on the first night we met that he was divorced with a nine-year-old daughter Jamie, who lives in the UK with her mother Luci(fer). We've discussed Jamie on numerous occasions as P has given me the background on the acrimonious split with Luci. P hasn't seen Jamie in quite a few months as Luci moved away and deliberately didn't give P a forwarding address. He only found out she was gone when he called Jamie on her last birthday and got a recorded message that the line had been cut. His friend went round to Luci's house and found it empty. Since then, P has engaged the services of a lawyer to try to get access to Jamie through the courts.

This is all still ongoing and will probably take years to resolve. It is something that is a part of P's life and while I am sympathetic towards him, another part of me is resentful that so much time, energy and money is spent on it. I don't know what it's like to be a parent, or what a parent's love for a child feels like. The closest I've probably felt is a deep attachment to my cocker spaniel. All I do know is that when he b*tches about Luci, it irritates me because another woman is taking up his thoughts and emotions. Yes, I do admit to being a jealous and selfish person at times, but I have never tried to hide that side of me. I hate the fact that another person has a part of his heart and always will. And it's a place which I will never get to be.

We had a heated discussion about the situation with Jamie yesterday, which ended up with me telling him to drop the court battle and just concentrate on getting a job for the moment. I'm sure some of you are gasping with horror at my 'coldness' but let's face facts, if I have never wanted my own kids, why in god's name would I want someone else's?

Whether I like it or not though, P is a father and neither time nor space can change that. Ironically, the fact that he understand the responsibilites of fatherhood is what draws me to him. He took very good care of me when I was sick and is selfless in so many ways. If he really did abandon Jamie, I would question his integrity as a person and completely lose respect for him. The question I have to ask myself is, can I handle a relationship with a man who has a child? It is not something that I have had to consider before and I realize that it is something that I don't yet know the answer to.

Of course, my preference is for someone who is childless. However, P is the white male version of me and it is not easy to find someone who is such a perfect fit in almost every other way. Perhaps this is one of life's lessons that I have to learn.

Having come from divorced parents myself, I know that it's certainly not easy and that I gave my dad's girlfriend a hard time for many years. My sister still doesn't talk to my dad and I don't have anything to do with my mother. It has only been in 2006 that my dad's girlfriend and I have come to a better place, mostly because I've mellowed out and realized that there are two sides to every story. Growing up, I only heard my mum's bitter version of events.

Now, it seems that life has come full circle and I am in the potential position of becoming a 'stepmum' myself. P has assured me that we will never have Jamie with us on a full-time basis, as Luci and her husband have custody of her. However, I know that situations will crop up that I may not like or be comfortable with. Can I be the woman that P needs me to be? Time will tell. All I do know for sure is that it will be a challenge and definitely take me out of my comfort zone.

I know that this isn't an easy entry for P to read, nor for my other friends who are in a similar situation. At the end of the day, we are in a grown up relationship trying to deal with grown up issues. As P told me this morning, "If you get p*ssed off, then you get p*ssed, we will work through it." I guess I couldn't have said it better myself.

Sometimes, Life Gives You the Red Dress Run

2006-10-16T08:57:00.000+08:00

I skidded into mid-week with a resounding crash, feeling stressed out in a major way due to work. I decided to go for a few drinks on Thursday with my girlfriends Oral Fix and Sexy Scooter to let off some steam.

We went to the Four Floors where Sexy Scooter and I hit the dance floor and almost immediately met B and P. Having quit their IT jobs in London earlier this year, the two sold most of their possessions and took off on this trip around the world with just their dive gear and a few pairs of shorts! They have been working as Dive Masters for the last couple of months and were only here for an afternoon to buy dive gear. Five days later, guess who are still on our small island?!

I decided to ask P to join me on the 8th Annual Red Dress run and we went out and bought a dress for him. Finding a dress for a Caucasian man is not as easy as you might think. We couldn't get most of the red numbers past his shoulders and I told him he needed to shop in a store for fat girls. However, as there are not many fat girls on this island, we had to make do with one of the open-air markets. We finally managed to find him a housecoat type dress and rolled up to the event that Saturday afternoon with Rachel and Nicole.

I have never done the Red Dress Run myself and seeing the runners arriving was just brilliant. Some of the guys had the cutest outfits on that even I would wear, while others in full make up and wigs looked downright ridiculous. Dresses were busting at the seams with man hair sprouting all over the place.

We started off in Chinatown and ended up in Little India via public transport! The looks we got were classic! Imagine a pack of 50+ people all in red dresses running through the most crowded areas of the city and you've pretty much got the run sorted. As this was hash run number 333, the event was named Halfway to Hell.

In true spirit, Oral Fix wore a clingy red number, devil horns and carried a pitchfork. Now, for those of you who have met her in person, you know that she has a 'ghetto booty', an ars* large enough to feed the African continent (her own description). For those of you who don't know her, take my word for it. She is a gorgeous girl but there's no denying it, baby got serious back!

She started running in front of us and her butt just took off on its own accord as a separate entity from the rest of her body. It did this hilarious u-shaped swinging bounce. You couldn't help your head doing its own u-shaped swing as you watched it. Kind of like those ornamental bobble-headed dogs. P and I looked at each other and just burst out laughing. It was worth doing the run just to see this doinga doinga doinga!

After the run, a bunch of us friends, including P and B, had dinner and drinks together by the river. It was a brilliant day and I had the best time. I had an early night as I had to go mountain biking across the border with my dad the next morning (which by the way was the best ride of the year to date).

It's funny how things go sometimes. There is that old saying, "God doesn't always give you what you want, but he gives you what you need". I am not a religious person, but I really felt that about life this week.

Breast Cancer Awareness (BCA) Run

2006-10-08T10:06:00.000+08:00

You know, raising money for charity is a curious thing. It brings out the best in some people, and the worst in others. I learnt that this week.

A few of my friends and I decided to take part in the annual BCA Run organized by the Hash House Harriets running (drinking!!) group on Saturday, 7 October. Originally, I was just going to pay my $25 registration fee, run/walk/hobble/crawl (in that order) the 5km and be done with it. I had also sent out information to my friends and family, asking them to join me. My dad didn’t want to do the run, but said he would give me $50 for the cause.

That gave me the idea to approach other people for sponsorship. I asked around at work and even hit up a couple of ex-boyfriends for money! I was very pleased that almost everyone opened their wallets and contributed generously. Within four days, I collected $1,351 for the Breast Cancer Foundation. Most of you know that this year, I lost a good friend to bile duct cancer and my aunt to lung cancer. I also have two friends who are currently in remission with breast cancer, one of whom is only 33. So this is a cause which is definitely very close to my heart.

The whole point of the run is to raise awareness of the disease and this week showed me that unfortunately, there are still ignorant people out there. One of my colleagues not only refused to donate any money as he said breast cancer didn’t affect him, he even went further and made a tasteless joke about it! Although it was hard for me to keep my cool, I managed to do so by reminding myself that a calm reaction would show him how immature he was being. It probably didn’t, but maybe some day he will realize that cancer is not as far away from his life as he’d like to believe.

Thankfully, some of my other colleagues were simply amazing and helped me to collect money from their departments. You know who you are and I am very grateful! Thank you so much and also to everyone who contributed to hopefully saving somebody’s life.

The race itself was a lot of fun. It was a very hazy day so not the best conditions for running outdoors. However, the group made up for it with their enthusiasm by bombing down the main shopping areas of our small island with the braver souls (both men and women) wearing decorated bras over their shirts. It must have been a real sight for the unsuspecting Saturday afternoon crowd out for a quiet coffee or two!

I ran/walked with my friends, all of whom are much fitter than I am but I made up for my slowness by raising the most money so whatever haha! This is the first time we’ve ever done any sort of charity event together so it was wonderful for us as a group.

Next week, a few of us are also participating in the 8th Annual Red Dress run to raise money for another charity. Red dresses are mandatory for all runners. Watch for those photos as I know that some of the men will even wear pumps. I hope that that will give me an advantage in keeping up with them!

P.S. I am still on sabbatical. Isn't it amazing what I can achieve when I'm not busy chasing boys?!! :-D

New Hair and Old Friends

2006-10-02T18:32:00.000+08:00

For all of you who haven’t seen me lately, I have chopped all my hair off! It is now a layered crop. Why did I do it? I suppose that along with being sick of men and their childish nonsense, I was also sick of my long hair. The best thing to do was to get rid of both!

I recently started a two-week sabbatical from men. Yes, it’s sad that two weeks for me is considered a sabbatical, but I can’t help it if boys (and I really do mean boys) like me! The break has been going pretty well, though my credit card has taken a beating recently and it coincides with the start of the sabbatical. I guess that I have just substituted one bad habit with another!

Last week, one of my closest friends visited our island on a business trip. I’ve known Copenhagen since our high school days back in Sacramento. We met in January 1987, which is almost 20 years ago, eek! I can’t believe that time has passed so quickly and that it has been eight years since we last saw each other in Denmark. We spent some fantastic quality time together and I was very happy to see her again. Although I’ve had an amazing year to date and have made some wonderful new friends, spending time with Copenhagen reminded me of how important my ‘older’ friends are, especially those who have stood by me all these years.

On the topic of good friends, I had another fun night out on Saturday with Rachel, Huney, Oral Fix and about seven or eight others. Covering every shade of white, yellow and brown, we were at my favourite Irish pub listening to the band. A recipe for success is definitely great music, good conversation and lots of alcohol :-).

We even met a laid back guy from Boston who has 11 tattoos. No, your eyesight isn’t going, it really is 11. When I asked him what his mum thought of his many tats, he said, “She likes them as she has some of her own!” How awesome is that?!! He told me that he comes from a family of bikers and that his mum has two motorcycles. I like her already!

Here's to cool chicks and hot guys! Oh I almost forgot, I'm on a sabbatical from men. Okay, well here's to cool chicks anyway!

Hey Ho Sailor!

2006-09-24T19:37:00.000+08:00

After a two-week exercise out at sea, my friends and I were all very happy to find out that Jack A's ship was coming back to our sunny shores for a few days.

Rachel, Sexy Scooter, Huney and I went down to the port on Saturday afternoon and met Jack A, who agreed to give us a tour of the frigate. Jack A was in his Officer's Whites and looked really cute, especially with his knee-high white socks!

We were welcomed on board by a drop-dead gorgeous Guard (I didn't catch his title, I could hardly concentrate while he spoke as I was trying my best not to drool). In his camos and carrying a big rifle, we are talking seriously YUM. Before we were allowed to run amok on board, he had to give us a safety briefing. During this, I rested my head on his broad and manly shoulder and he let me. The girls just cracked up. We all loved him, what a charmer!

Jack A then took us to the wardroom, where we had cokes with no ice. Apparently the ice chest was locked up, weird but hey, it's the navy! We were given a tour of the officer's quarters and I think we must have woken half of them up with our giggling and carrying on!

Afterwards we were taken to the bridge. The equipment and fittings looked like something out of an 80's movie, really quite dated but super cool nonetheless.

The highlight for me was seeing the Merlin helicopter, which my cousin Lt RC also flies. None of us expected it to be so HUGE! We all gasped when we walked into the hanger. Besides carrying two pilots and several 'strategists', it can also hold a fair bit of cargo (both human and non). It is one kick a** machine and I was well impressed with it.

During our tour of the ship, Jack A showed me the navy's flight magazine. My cousin Lt RC was featured in it as he had successfully carried out the first ever One Engine Inoperative (OEI) landing on a Type 23 Frigate during a multi-national ASUW sortie off Pakistani Makran coast territorial waters! In simple English, it means that he managed to land his helicopter back on the ship after one of the engines failed, saving both the valuable crew and aircraft. To say that I felt proud when I read that article would be the understatement of the century. Respect Cuz, you never fail to amaze and inspire me.

A very BIG thank you to Jack A for inviting us on Her Majesty's Ship and to all his colleagues who made us feel so welcomed, especially you, Mr Hot Stuff Navy Guard!

You guys can come back to our very small island any time (though night would be best haha)!!

Mwah!

Her Majesty's Ship is Alongside!

2006-09-10T09:10:00.000+08:00

My cousin Lt RC is a Merlin pilot in the British Royal Navy. Earlier this week, he told me that one of his friends, Jack A (who also flies a Merlin), would be in town with his ship and asked if I would meet up with him. My cousin is one of the most outstanding guys I know (I'm not being biased, he really is) so I figured that he wouldn't hang out with losers. I agreed to meet with Jack A and we had our first "blind date" on Thursday.

Neither my cousin nor Jack A would tell me what the latter looked like. In fact, in one of his smses to me, my cousin wrote, "He's about 3 foot 6! Face like a comfortable pair of slippers. Friendly smile. When you see someone like that, call his number, I bet it'll be him who picks up!". Not really something to instill a whole lot of confidence, so I was a little bit apprehensive about meeting him.

I got to the bar early and found myself a corner to hid in. Shortly afterwards, a very pleasant looking man walked in and looked around. Luckily, he was a wee bit taller than 3 foot 6 and my cousin was right, he did have a very friendly smile. Also, he has gorgeous killer blue eyes!

We had drinks and dinner and I don't think I stopped talking or laughing for the entire time. Jack A is a great guy and we even called my cousin and left a semi-drunken message on his answering machine! As it was a school night, we cut the evening short and agreed to meet up again the following night.

On Friday, Rachel, Natalie and myself joined Jack A and the Seaman Officers for drinks at the Insane Creature with a Trunk. Some of the SOs were pleasant enough but personally, I still think pilots are the best!!

We ended up at a dance club where I ran into some other friends, including my all time favourite Aussie, Crazy C, who told me that after seeing my dragon tat, he wanted to get an eagle tattooed across his entire chest! For your own sake honey, I hope that you are just kidding!

We all went out again on Saturday with the usual suspects, this time including Oral Fix and Andy. There was also a few people that I'd only met a couple of times before. Jack A came with an Engineering Officer, who is one of those seemingly quiet on the surface but has a wicked sense of humour type guys. A lot of fun to chill with and very down to earth.

I don't think the two Brits were quite prepared for our crowd. Besides simulated 'pole dancing', one of the girls also conducted a hands on "who has the biggest package" poll! For a change, it wasn't me getting up to mischief. I was too tired from partying the night before and just watched all the naughtiness with amusement.

Well, the ship will be back in a couple of weeks and hopefully, Jack A will be able to get us on board and give us a tour. When we were at the Insane Creature with a Trunk the night before, I had asked Jack A as a joke (sort of), "Can we come into your cabin?!". At that exact moment, the music dropped and a woman sitting at the table next to us looked at me askanced and said, "I heard that!!".

Oops!

She's Been Inked! Part 2

2006-09-04T19:58:00.000+08:00

They say a picture speaks a thousand words, so here are two thousand...

Thank you to Rachel and Oral Fix for holding my hand during the outlining and shading sessions respectively. The moral support meant a lot to me and I really appreciate the two of you taking the time out to be there for it!

In case you all are wondering, hell YEAH it hurt! Especially over the hip bone. I was breathing hard trying to keep my cool and moaning involuntarily when Oral Fix quipped (much to the amusement of the tattoo artist who luckily has a steady hand), "If I were a lesbian, I would be so turned on right now!".

The head of the dragon was traced from a pattern but the body was sketched and shaded freehand. J is a real artist and a cutie to boot! I love the way the dragon looks and to me, it symbolizes power and strength. After what I've been through this year, I know I have a lot of both!

It doesn't mean that I don't feel pain though. In the cab on the way home, Oral Fix said to me, "Girl, your nostrils were so flared, you could have popped a baby out through them!". Hahaha, well I know that even though it hurt, I got past it. Yee haw!

If you want to see more of J's amazing work, you can check his website www.kustoms7tattoos.multiply.com.

Sunday: The Day of Hash

2006-09-03T22:05:00.000+08:00

Another fantastic bike hash Sunday with an amazing ride through some technical offroad. Certain portions of the trail were pretty tough (I dismounted and walked those bits) but it was two hours of the most sweaty fun I've had in months! No disrespect to you boys out there but the hash IS hard to beat!

My poor Dad took quite a tumble towards the end of the ride. I missed seeing it live in action as I was doing my "Back of the Pack" special i.e. being the slowest one in the group as usual. Another hasher, Fat Crashing B*stard, fell into a hole and my Dad followed shortly afterwards directly behind him. My Dad went over the handlebars and hit the ground face first. Luckily he escaped with only a bloody nose and a sore shoulder. Thank you to everyone on the hash who helped him, in particular Barbarian and Goes Both Ways.

I also had some assistance hitting a super steep hill. I was so tired by this point and was on my last reserves of energy. A very special German had his left hand steering his bike and the right on my lower back. We cycled side by side and he literally pushed me all the way up! Fat Crashing B*stard asked me what I was doing while the German had his hand near my a** and I said in all honesty, "Panting hard!"

A bunch of us then spent the rest of the afternoon at Coo Chi Coo and No Good's poolside drinking and talking trash. Their condo overlooks the south of the island and we had a beautiful sea view. It was a gorgeous sunny day. What more could one really ask for?

Have any of you every hung out with three Americans? Oral Fix brought two US Marines that she works with. Don't get me wrong, I love my American friends but they sure do talk a lot! And coming from me, that is really saying something. They all tend to speak at the same time but claim that they still manage to understand each other!

Now I'm at home, tired out and it's almost time to hit the sack. I hope all of you out there are having as much fun as I am. I LOVE my life!

She's Been Inked! Part 1

2006-09-01T12:45:00.000+08:00

My flatmate Rachel had been thinking about getting a tattoo for the longest time. She did it this week. Here she is with her symbol of freedom!

Watch this space for "She's Been Inked! Part 2".

Boys, Boys, Boys!

2006-08-26T07:55:00.000+08:00

I just want to say a very Happy 25th Birthday to my lovely South African friend and colleague Toz! Thanks for the generous invitation to celebrate it with you guys on Thursday. I had a great time! *Mwah*!

After dancing late into the night with my office crush JV (another ZA cutie) during Toz's birthday party, I was hesitant about going out again on Friday. A "mature" and "sensible" 30-something like myself really does need her rest. However, Ms No Willpower couldn't resist the call of her favourite Irish pub and there I was again on Friday night with Natalie.

We agreed that it would just be a couple of quiet drinks and then home early to bed (yeah right). We were chilling out with the boys in the "Truth is Stranger than Fiction" (TSF) entry, yes, the very same who dressed up as women. I think that this Irish pub attracts the more "unique" specimens of the human population inhabiting this small island, though I do exclude myself from this category haha.

Anyhow, the tallest person I have EVER seen walks in and immediately captures the attention of everyone in our group. Conversation stops and we all zoom in on him. Being six foot TEN (that's 2.08 metres for my metric friends) in a country where the average male height is five foot seven (1.70m) does make you stand out, oh, just a little bit. I took a photo of Natalie with him so all of you who are subscribed to my blog will have seen it. Even sitting down, he's still taller than I am. Like wow.

I thought to myself, "If this is the weirdest that this evening is going to get, then we are not doing too badly." Famous last words. As my friend and bike hash buddy Oral Fix once said to me, "If trouble doesn't come knocking at your door, then it comes knocking next door!".

Hanging out with the TSF boys does bring its own adventures and true enough, at about midnight, Craig decided that it was time to get his lip pierced, something he'd been wanting to do for a while. So Craig, Natalie and I trooped off to a tattoo parlour at the Four Floors, where a very heavily-tattooed young man sits big boy down and proceeds to skewer his lower lip. I could barely stand to watch but I must have, because I have the photos to prove it (which you guys have also seen).

When he went back to the ho bar to show the rest of his friends, two more of the Crackpot Charlies joined in and got their tongues pierced. Surreal? Yeah, you could say it did feel a bit like that. But that's how my nights out always seem to turn out. Either it's just me, or I really do need to find some new people to hang out with!

Reflections and the Other Side of Me

2006-08-23T21:56:00.001+08:00

Most of you are aware that the last year of my life has been pretty eventful, with both good and not-so-good things happening. It has been very easy to write about the fun part, which has made up the bulk of stories in my blog up to now. But the tough stuff? Now, that is a side of me that not many people get to see.....

What made me start this particular entry? I received a request from a friend in the US a few months ago which I have yet to fulfill and it has been on my conscience. She asked me to write down all the memories of her sister, Lane, so that her six-year-old daughter would have something to remember her mother by when she grows up. But four months later, I am still unable to put pen to paper and finish up what I started.

In April, I lost my amazing friend Lane, whom I have known for 15 years, to bile duct cancer. She was only 36. Five painful weeks later, my Aunt (who was my dad's younger sister and my godmother) also died of lung cancer. No one who has seen a person die from this disease can ever remain the same. Both Lane and my Aunt fought a battle that I'm not sure I would have been brave enough to face. They were uncomplaining, stoically enduring incredible amounts of pain, especially towards the end when 24-hour morphine drips didn't make a blind bit of difference.

I remember visiting my Aunt in hospital one day. Next to her was a terribly thin young (20s) woman with a shaved head, kneeling on the bed and hugging a pillow, retching up the nothing that was left in her stomach. I couldn't even look at her and hold it all together while I was listening to her throw up. It is incredibly humbling to watch someone suffer so much through no fault of their own. This young woman should have been in the prime of her life: working on her career, hanging out with friends, dating, maybe getting married and having kids of her own. Instead, she knelt on the bed beside me, dying a little bit with every minute that passed.

I felt that I was a part of a horrible and intimate experience, and that it was obscene of me to be sitting there with my healthy body and beautiful designer clothes. It made me feel both helpless and so angry at how unfair life can be. But coming out of those difficult months, what I've also realized is that that is just the way life is. You can't change it, but you can certainly kill yourself trying.

I myself have been guilty of complaining about petty things and not feeling happy with all the wonderful things that I have. Spending just an hour in an oncology ward really shook me up, a very hard wake up call.

Through the grieving, I've made a real effort to go out and live a full a life as possible. It was during this time that my dad and I joined the bike hash. Sometimes, I feel like I am two different people. The person that I am in public is my happy me. But when I'm alone in my bed at night, I really feel the depth of my grief. I miss them so much and you don't stop loving someone just because they are dead. But life does go on for the living and at some point, you just have to accept that they are no longer there, at least not in the physical sense.

I recently read a dedication in a book, 'Night Swimming' by Robin Schwarz, and she wrote it beautifully:

"In memory of my dear friend, who remains alive in my heart and forever loved. You are not gone...you've simply gone ahead".

You know that old cliche, live each day as if it were your last? Well, I'm doing that now. In a way, Lane’s and my Aunt's deaths set me free. Set me free from worrying about the inconsequential things in life. It has sharpened my focus on what is important. If someone had told me a year and a half ago that they'd be gone today, I would have laughed. But it did happen, so I try to be in the moment, every moment. No matter who I'm with, I do my best to focus on having the best possible time with them.

And I have to say, although it has taken some time, I have never been happier. And I mean truly feeling utter joy at being with the people that I care about. All of you who have known me for a long time say I've mellowed out a lot. I just don't sweat the small stuff these days. It's pointless and I am so grateful for what I have. You don't have to go searching for happiness, it's inside you. You just need to know where to look and who to share it with. I know that I'm lucky, I have friends and family (some of you are both) who are quality people. You know who you are.

And my message to Lane's sister? I will get that letter to you really soon.

I'm all Hot, Sweaty and Out of Breath!

2006-08-21T19:02:00.000+08:00

Since I joined the bike hash a few months ago, my flatmate Rachel has seen me collapse home in a heap on more than one Sunday afternoon. I often have had to crawl from the front door to my bed, legs a-shaking and wrists so sore that I can't lift anything heavier than a glass of vodka cranberry. However, in spite of the pain, I keep going back time after time. What makes me do it? After all, I just don't enjoy exercising. In fact, there is nothing better to me than chilling out, drink in hand (which is what I'm doing now, by the way). And it can't be the $60 membership fee. I spend more than that on one half of a pair of shoes.

It's simple, as with any fantastic experience that I have, it's all about the people. I just love the bike hash crew.

Being a person who has very long-lasting friendships, I felt that our little circle of friends had gotten into a rut lately. We all seemed to be seeing the same old faces, hanging out at the same watering holes, etc, etc, etc. So this past Sunday, I managed to convince Rachel and my friend Natalie (who were both a part of my Truth is Stranger than Fiction night, see below) to try out the running hash.

We got to the site, or what we thought was the site, and 10 minutes before the run started, there were still no others in sight. Not a good start. After much calling around, we drove to another location and were surrounded by hashers called Hard Licker, Spiderman and so on. I knew then that we were in the right place.

The run/walk started pleasantly enough. With 30-odd men and women of all ages and nationalities trailing at the back of people's houses and across drains, it seemed like I had come up with another bright if quirky idea. The weather was gorgeous, the sun setting with just a hint of a breeze. The three of us managed to stay together at first but I realized very shortly into the run that I could not keep up with Rachel and Natalie. What gave me that idea? See the photo. This was taken two minutes after we started and they were already several hundred metres ahead of me (it looks like I am a lot closer than that because I cropped it)!

To my credit, I did try running. I lasted for oh, 200 metres? Actually it was probably more like 100 metres but I was in such pain that I couldn't really judge properly. In my defence, it was on an uphill stretch. My lungs felt like they were about to burst and I seriously felt sick. Being too out of breath to speak, I used sign language and waved the two of them to go on ahead without me. I think part of why I had difficulty breathing was also because I was eating their dust....

To my relief, I was not the only one at the back of the pack. I fell in with two other women who were also as slow as I was and we walked together for a while. I was feeling pretty good about myself, until I found out they had both recently had two months off work recovering from major surgery!!

On that depressing note, I took a short cut and went back to the start of the run. All in all, I probably walked five km, while Rachel and Natalie covered closer to eight. On a positive note, they both really enjoyed the hash and will go regularly!

Me? I'm a biker babe and I'll stick with my boys from the SBH!

On Singlehood, Rock Stars and Champagne Nights

2006-08-20T10:17:00.000+08:00

My best friend sent me the World's Shortest Fairytale, which my single girlfriends and I found hilarious. It's too good (and true!) not to share:

World's Shortest Fairytale
Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl "Will you marry me?". The girl said, "NUP!"

And the girl lived happily ever after and went shopping, dancing, drank martinis, always had a clean house, never had to cook, had sex with whomever she pleased...did whatever the hell she wanted, never argued, didn't get fat, travelled a lot, had many boyfriends, saved more money, and had all the hot water to herself.

She watched chick flicks, never football, had high self esteem, never cried or yelled, felt and looked fabulous in sweat pants, smoked, swore and burped all the time.

THE END

On Thursday night, I went to the INXS concert as I am a HUGE fan of JD Fortune, the most delicious Canuck on planet Earth! I was too far from the stage to take any good photographs, but close enough to scream his name!

I know a Kiwi teacher here who looks a lot like JD and I must confess that I have a mini-crush on him. By coincidence, I ran into him the very next night at a very crowded and noisy pub. We started talking and I learnt that he had also been at the concert. During our conversation about INXS, he leant down and sang some of 'Never Tear Us Apart' to me, his warm breath on my ear. How come they never had teachers this gorgeous when I was in school? Sigh...

Later the same evening, a bunch of us went to one of the Quays. My beautiful friend (who is named after a motorized vehicle) and I decided to split and go dancing on our own. We didn't get very far though as a handsome dark-haired man did a double take when he saw Sexy Scooter and stopped us in our tracks. They were Qantas cabin crew ("M'am, would you like chicken or fish?") and really cute. Somehow, I found myself walking barefoot through a fountain (the kind that spurts out directly from the floor), getting my 'Lucky' jeans (private joke) totally wet in the process! We ended the night by being served champagne and grooving with the two cruisy Aussie boys (who by the way, could really dance!) at the bar with a view. What a great way to start the weekend!

This was obviously my time for Moet and beautiful skylines. The very next night, I was in my dad's apartment, drinking more of the bubbly stuff. His partner had invited me over for dinner and she prepared a delicious Japanese hotpot dish with very tender Shabu Shabu beef. As I sat on the 20th floor balcony looking out at the city, laughing with them and having an amazing time, I thought to myself, "Life doesn't get any better than this!"

So although this weekend didn't involve house keys on piercings or any other shocking experiences, I still had a fantastic couple of days with friends and family. I can't wait to see what next weekend brings woo hooooooooooo!!!

Fireworks

2006-08-13T19:44:00.000+08:00

Last Friday, I took my cousin out for dinner and to watch the fireworks on a cruise boat as we haven’t spent much together lately. It was great to be out on the water and we had a really lovely evening. She surprised me by giving me a fantastic racer back top embroidered with a dragon that she and her sister had bought for me in Bangkok. Good stuff!

A Rose by Any Other Name...

2006-08-07T10:26:00.000+08:00

So, after the break up of my last long-term relationship, I decided to do something really different to celebrate my new found freedom. What could be more unusual for someone who does NO exercise than to join a mountain biking hash group (an offshoot of the infamous Hash House Harriet runners)?

Unwilling to suffer alone, I dragged my dad along with me. One Sunday morning after a grueling two-hour 'trial' ride through some dense offroad tracks in extreme humidity and heat, we unwittingly (the sun must have fried our brain cells) signed on the dotted line and foolishly became members of the Bike Hash. In my defence, I was not myself that day. The night before, I had partied hard and was both hungover and had only two hours sleep. Plus I was about as unfit as a well, a very unfit fiddle.

The concept of the bike hash is simple. About once a month, a motley crew of crazy expats and even crazier locals meet at various locations to mountain bike through different areas of the island. 'Hares', those hardworking souls who lay the trail with either flour, chalk or toilet paper (only 100% biodegradable materials), map out a ride for the rest of us. There are false offshoots to ensure that the slower riders can catch up with the faster ones. The goal is to cover 20km in 2 hours, with the entire pack getting back to the starting point within 20 minutes of each other. Afterwards, what happens on the ride is dissected in the 'circle', where we welcome the virgins (first time riders). In addition, the person who comes up with the most stupid "quote of the day" and other individuals who commit any other transgressions have to participate in a "Down Down" ie basically a public humiliation.

Some of the members have hash names, which go along the lines of Oral Fix, Fat Stuck B*stard, G-String, No Good and so on. As you can imagine, these names usually stem from some unfortunate act or comment which the individual did or said. For almost six months, I was lucky enough not to have my more foolish moments witnessed by any of the other members. This was because I was always the slowest rider at the back of the pack. However, my luck ran out this past Sunday, when I was called into the circle for a personal best record of THREE times.

Transgression No 1:
During the first 10 minutes of the ride, my nose started to run. Not wanting to wipe snot on my sleeves, I politely asked the Grand Master who happened to be cycling by at the time, "Barbarian, may I take some of the toilet paper (that was used to lay the trail) to blow my nose?". Yes, in hindsight, I should have just quietly picked it off the bush and not brought attention to myself. However, I was smack bang in the middle of the pack and doing so would probably have incurred a worse punishment. I naively thought that Barbarian would not bring it up in the circle, but well, he did. And the result? I now have a hash name. Could it be something hot, perhaps sexy, maybe cool? No, it is....Nose Wipe. When I complained bitterly that I didn't like it, my so-called "friend", Oral Fix, shouted out, "Hey, at least be glad they didn't call you A** Wipe!". Okay, point taken.

Transgression No 2:
James* called me into the circle and told the following story about me, "Now before the ride this morning, I saw Nose Wipe cycling up and down the road. She seemed to be having some problems with her bike so I asked her what was wrong. She said that she was having difficulty changing the gears. So I thought perhaps it was some issue with the wiring, maybe the lever was stuck, whatever. But no, when I asked why she had couldn't change the gears properly, she told me, 'My nails are too long!'."

Transgression No 3:
No reason apart from the fact that they needed a local in the circle to do a "Down Down" with G-String and since I was already down (no pun intended)......

All in all, it was a hilarious day, though I have to admit the joke was on me. But if you can't laugh at yourself (or let 50 other people laugh at you), then what's the point? I love being a part of the SBH because I have seen some areas of the island that I otherwise wouldn't have, and I have also made some great friends.

Another highlight of the ride was that one of the 'Hares' was also named. Having recced the area several times while plotting out the trail in the preceeding weeks, he was stung by a hornet during the line of duty. His new hash name? Wh*renet. You gotta love it!

On On!

*Names have been changed not to protect the innocent, but to prevent them from kicking my b*tt

Pic o' me

2006-08-07T10:18:00.000+08:00

Truth is Stranger than Fiction

2006-08-07T08:48:00.000+08:00

It all started out innocently enough. My British ex-husband Mark* emailed me to say that his childhood friend Dan was getting married and would I show the newlyweds around while they were passing through on their way to Thailand for their honeymoon. Sure I said, why not?

So on Friday night 4 August, Dan (whom I hadn't seen in over 10 years), his wife Deirdre (it was her first time in Asia and I had never met her before), my friend Natalie and myself had happy hour drinks at a bar on the 72nd floor of one of the hotels. It has a fantastic view of the city and is very posh. Then we went for a delicious local dinner. Natalie kindly drove us around in her BMW so I think we were giving the newlyweds a rather civilized and positive impression of our country.

We got to my favourite Irish pub and many more friends arrived, including my flatmate Rachel. We were having a great time and I should have known it would go downhill when three big white guys walked in dressed as women. They had full make up on, painted nails and pantyhose. One was in a long orange dress, the second in a green mu-mu type number and the third was in a baby doll top and matching bloomer shorts. He had padded (though admittedly lumpy) breasts. On each large head was a scarf (babushka) that cleaning ladies in the UK wear.

Well, you could have heard a pin drop. Our entire table, in stunned silence, collectively eyeballed the three very ugly "women" walk across the bar to join their friends. To my growing horror, I realized that I actually knew one of them, whom I had spoken to a couple of times before. Craig is from the UK, has a shaved head, several huge tattoos and works in construction. Oh, and he's built like a brick sh*thouse.

Whereas I would normally go over and talk to them, I thought it wouldn't give Dan and Deirdre a very good impression so I played it cool and continued to sip my vodka cranberry. Unfortunately, Craig not only paints a mean fingernail, he also has very sharp eyesight. Not long afterwards, he slowly strutted over in our direction, causing me to panic but realizing too late that there was no place to hide. He stopped in front of our table, pointed at me and pursed his lips in a kiss. My friends burst out laughing and I was completely mortified. Seeing that the game was up, I gave in gracefully and introduced Britain's Finest to everyone and we all had a good laugh. At some point during the evening, the lead singer of the band got Dan and Deirdre to have a dance and I took some hilarious photos of the love birds in the foreground, and three men in drag slow dancing in the background.

Note to the double Ds: please send the pics to me so I can forward those on! Note to ex-husband: don't say that I don't show your friends a good time!

The newlyweds left shortly afterwards and it's a good thing that they did because the following then happened:
1. Craig and his friend Ken in the orange dress snogged. If you have never seen two men the size of tanks in full make up french kiss, take my word for it, you need a strong stomach.
2. The third "woman" in the babydoll top pulled down his bloomers. On the end of his pierced manhood (also known as a Prince Albert for all of you not in the know), hung his house keys. I SWEAR that this part is true, and I have my friends as fellow witnesses. Not only that, but he was so well hung that I am sure he could have opened his front door without taking the keys off his piercing.

Well, what can I say? This is NOT a typical night out with me. On that note, we decided to go over to another party nightspot also known as the four floors of wh*res. I mean, why not continue on the path we were obviously meant to walk that Friday night? We danced at up a storm and finally at one in the morning, we wisely decided to call it a night.

On the way to the car, Rachel reached over and rubbed at my cheek, saying, "Oh, there's some of Craig's lipstick!" from where he had kissed me goodbye. Now, maybe it's just me, but isn't there something terribly wrong with that statement?!!

*Names have been changed to protect the traumatized.